Living with Bitterness #anger #MayaAngelou #anxiety #cancer

Living with Bitterness
#anger #MayaAngelou #anxiety #cancer

“Bitterness is like cancer. It eats upon the host. But anger is like fire. It burns it all clean.” —Maya Angelou
In the words of one of the greatest writers of all time, “anger is like fire.” It sits deep in your soul and spreads like wild fires on dessert land with no rain in sight. Ms. Angelou says anger “burns it all clean,” but she didn’t make much about the difference between her first metaphor about bitterness, which she says, “is like cancer… eating up the host” and anger. What did she mean by her pertinent analogy?

The dictionary defines bitterness as “resentment, disappointment at being treated unfairly.” It, also, defines anger as “a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure or hostility.” Both sound very much the same. However, I believe Ms. Angelou distinguished the two. She meant that bitterness was like cancer, homeostatic, sitting quietly in your cells, but growing. Anger, however, actually is a forceful movement toward change—like fire. I would tend to agree with this concept, if I accept her precept.

I have been angry a lot in my life. But more than angry, I have been bitter—deeply bitter from hurt that has gone unrequited. I had an alcoholic father who abused everyone around him. I had committed partners who have committed adultery. I have had friends steal from me. I have had people speak lies about me. But what has caused the most bitterness is the feeling that I believe Creator God would want me to forgive everyone without the need to work through the problems, first.

What rises in me when someone wrongs me, now, is pure anger. The bitterness is gone. I’ve worked through the whys and hows. Now I need to make some fierce changes with how I handle bitterness and being mistreated. In other words, I must create better boundaries to stop what has happened in the past, but also work on the triggers of the old bitterness as well.

The one time I remember in my life I let my anger manifest, I ended up in the worst predicament I had ever been in, in my life. Anger caused a complete dismantling of my life and some friendships. I was exonerated of the wrong, but I still felt bitter. Anger without the release of bitterness makes no sense. There must be a way to extinguish both!

Many therapists and psychologists say that anger is the final stage of grief. What I perceive as a hypnotherapist and life coach is that bitterness is habitual, negative thinking. So, to get out of bitterness we must create actions to circumvent or interrupt the neural pathways of the habitual thought or action. If you seriously don’t want to be bitter anymore about someone or some action, then you must take control of your mind and stop the habit of thinking the negative thought. This process takes diligence and may take a clinical hypnotherapist to help. But, changing your belief will also stop the growth of the resentment building inside like a cancer. You must do this, or else you will end sick, because as we know, cancer often kills!

***
I am moving to Southern Florida to begin a new small imprint publishing company called: Finding Authentic You Publishing: findingauthenticyoupublishing.com. I am accepting submissions now for my January 2015 bookshelf. If you or any friends are interested, please go to the website and read the submission guidelines. Thanks.
Finding Authentic You is my brand and is also a self-help guide, which I wrote, with 365 Discoveries, meant to aid you in facilitating some of life’s most difficult challenges, like sleep. But, the discoveries also lead you to what you believe spiritually, understanding your goals, learning to believe in your self, discovering the most distinct you, unlocking all of your negative thinking, and helping you replace it with positive, creative thought using many different modalities, including hypnosis, prayer, and psychology. Once you know yourself, then relationship with Spirit and people is a fairly easy task.

For much more information about finding out about the psychology of the human mind and being your authentic self, self-love, and self-esteem, check out my new book below. “Finding Authentic You” will answer many of the questions I propose above. The book also has many discoveries about health, both mental and physical, as well as spiritual discoveries to lead you to your highest and best! Thanks for being a part of my tribe and helping get this book and all of my media below into the right hands, helping the right hearts.

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding%20authentic%20you&sprefix=finding+%2Caps&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Afinding%20authentic%20you

Finding Authentic You: With 365 Daily Discoveries & 7 Steps to Effective Change

* Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or http://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed. Please spread the word by liking the page or sharing this with your friends.

Anticipation of Change #Change #releasingthepast

Anticipation of Change
#Change #releasingthepast

I have been on the precipice of change for almost a month now. Every day, I have to pray to God that I contain my anxiousness enough to live in the present and to continue to hold on to the premise that “expectations are prepackaged resentments.”

I remember a time in life when I had $500 in the bank, was 21 years old, and living in Beaver Falls, Pennsylvania with my mother, sister, and her 1-year-old son. I received a phone call from a director friend (who has recently passed away of cancer) in NYC asking if I wanted to sublet his apartment for the summer. He would charge me $250 a month, which was amazingly cheap, if I would just take care of a few things for him while he was away at summer stock. He needed an answer the next day, which would mean I would be on a bus headed for a city I had only visited once and was too overwhelmed to even consume the vastness of its danger, magnificence, and opportunity. However, I had been dreaming of New York since I was young. So, without hesitation, I said yes.

I was on a bus to NYC the next week with only two suitcases holding everything I would need to audition, live, and survive. I had no prospects of a job, but I knew I could do just about anything, if it would mean surging toward my dream. So, in my heart, I had no qualms about finding that one perfect job that solved my financial problem of having the money for the rent the next month, classes, and food.

I had a college roommate, who, also, has since died of diseases related HIV Disease, who worked as a waiter in a great restaurant. He introduced me to the owner. She was Italian and liked me, immediately. I began to trail Rick the next day and enjoyed 2 years of working at The Fives, which I believe still exists. Life seemed to flow like water from a fountain. I even got my Actor’s Equity card in the first month I was there, which is unheard of. I had the fire in my loins that it took to make effective change and a dream that had carried with it no shadows of despair.
Today, I’m older and have had much loss and have expected way too much of life. However, I realize that the power, the dream, and the recognition that Life is on my side, even when I believe it isn’t, remains with me, just as it did when I was twenty-one. You see, even my partner leaving, my best friend moving to Thailand, and my mother having a blocked carotid artery all in the same week was a shove toward the future that I needed to make this “Encore Career” move.

I feel fortunate to be in this moment, because life is surging through my veins again like a vital energy I haven’t felt in years. I have a new relationship that looks amazingly promising, a new publishing company I began a month ago, with 2o of my books, healing Mp3s, and a yoga video. My boss at the YMCA has offered to introduce me to 3 of the supervisors at neighboring Y’s in south Florida to teach yoga. And some of my current coaching clients are going to stay with me on Face Time.

The only thing that stands in my way is my own anxious thoughts about what to expect from the next moment. I am currently using my down time to meditate to extract these unrealistic beliefs that life should be in my timing, not God’s. I believe this with all my heart and I pray to release expectation, which has no spiritual, nutritional value. These are the only two hindrances that can keep anyone from essential and mortal change.

***
I am moving to Southern Florida to begin a new small imprint publishing company called: Finding Authentic You Publishing: findingauthenticyoupublishing.com. I am accepting submissions now for my January 2015 bookshelf. If you or any friends are interested, please go to the website and read the submission guidelines. Thanks.
Finding Authentic You is my brand and is also a self-help guide, which I wrote, with 365 Discoveries, meant to aid you in facilitating some of life’s most difficult challenges, like sleep. But, the discoveries also lead you to what you believe spiritually, understanding your goals, learning to believe in your self, discovering the most distinct you, unlocking all of your negative thinking, and helping you replace it with positive, creative thought using many different modalities, including hypnosis, prayer, and psychology. Once you know yourself, then relationship with Spirit and people is a fairly easy task.

For much more information about finding out about the psychology of the human mind and being your authentic self, self-love, and self-esteem, check out my new book below. “Finding Authentic You” will answer many of the questions I propose above. The book also has many discoveries about health, both mental and physical, as well as spiritual discoveries to lead you to your highest and best! Thanks for being a part of my tribe and helping get this book and all of my media below into the right hands, helping the right hearts.
http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding%20authentic%20you&sprefix=finding+%2Caps&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Afinding%20authentic%20you


Finding Authentic You: With 365 Daily Discoveries & 7 Steps to Effective Change

* Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or http://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed. Please spread the word by liking the page or sharing this with your friends.

Constructing a Jigsaw Puzzle with Broken Pieces #transformation #releasingthepast

Constructing a Jigsaw Puzzle with Broken Pieces
#transformation #releasingthepast

I have constructed a few jigsaw puzzles in my fifty-three years. I remember finishing one particular puzzle of a beautiful Burma Railway over the River Khwae Yai. After finding all the edges first, then beginning the tedious task of assembling the numerous and often oddly shaped, interlocking and tessellating pieces, I realized that three of the main puzzle pieces were broken and a few were even lost, leaving the beautiful picture I was to follow as a pattern from the front cover of the box, looking a bit like an old bridge with some of its basic assembly torn and tattered. This pictured remained in my mind like a mistaken tattoo gotten on a drunken evening.

Jigsaw puzzles were initially a picture painted on a large board, then cut apart with a jig saw; hence, the name. John Spillbury, an English cartographer, is credited for beginning the mass craze in the late 1700s. Puzzle enthusiasts can spend hundreds of hours constructing 5000-piece jigsaw puzzles; sometimes, even varnishing and displaying them in beautiful frames.
I don’t suppose I would have wanted to display the last puzzle I completed, because it had been constructed with broken and missing pieces. How beautiful could a puzzle be if it has broken pieces?

I often feel this way when I take a panoramic view of my own life, watching from above like a eagle in flight. I see fragments of beauty. I see roads leading to paths unknown. I see a great deal of pain. I see graves for that which I lost. But, mostly, what I notice more than any one thing is missing pieces, parts I can’t define or piece together in a way that seem to interlock and hold fast. I imagine that those pieces of my life must be broken or simply not be fitting together correctly. So, I leave those pieces sitting on the side of my life until I understand where they belong.
In times past, I would try to stuff the pieces into a places in my life that seemed to have a hole there, but not exactly matching the curves and angles of the piece of the puzzle I held in my hand. In those times, I had realized that I’d often broken the puzzle piece by trying to fit it somewhere it shouldn’t have been in the first place.

I believe, now, that life would be okay with a few missing pieces. In fact, if the puzzle were completely constructed, my life would feel as it were coming to a close. If that were the case, the only action left to do would be to deconstruct it or display it. I’m not sure which I would choose, but know I want to continue on the path of constructing my life piece by piece. This is living in the now, taking the parts of your life given to you by spirit and managing them as best as you can—even the broken pieces a place if you wait long enough. I know that many times, years later, I have been able to take an old pain or heartbreak and fit the piece into a perfect place in my life’s puzzle. I find reason and understanding where I could see it before, leaving room for more self-compassion, first, and usually for the other person who seemed to stymie the construction of a particular part of my life.

No puzzle is perfect when it comes to life. Be amazed at the missing parts, knowing that God’s intention is to find the exact measure for every space left empty in your heart and mind.

***
I am moving to Southern Florida to begin a new small imprint publishing company called: Finding Authentic You Publishing: findingauthenticyoupublishing.com. I am accepting submissions now for my January 2015 bookshelf. If you or any friends are interested, please go to the website and read the submission guidelines. Thanks.
Finding Authentic You is my brand and is also a self-help guide, which I wrote, with 365 Discoveries, meant to aid you in facilitating some of life’s most difficult challenges, like sleep. But, the discoveries also lead you to what you believe spiritually, understanding your goals, learning to believe in your self, discovering the most distinct you, unlocking all of your negative thinking, and helping you replace it with positive, creative thought using many different modalities, including hypnosis, prayer, and psychology. Once you know yourself, then relationship with Spirit and people is a fairly easy task.

For much more information about finding out about the psychology of the human mind and being your authentic self, self-love, and self-esteem, check out my new book below. “Finding Authentic You” will answer many of the questions I propose above. The book also has many discoveries about health, both mental and physical, as well as spiritual discoveries to lead you to your highest and best! Thanks for being a part of my tribe and helping me make this book be a Bestseller.

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding%20authentic%20you&sprefix=finding+%2Caps&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Afinding%20authentic%20you


Finding Authentic You: With 365 Daily Discoveries & 7 Steps to Effective Change

* Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or http://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed. Please spread the word by liking the page or sharing this with your friends.

Like a Butterfly #transformation #butterflies

Like a Butterfly
#transformation #butterflies

No living creature on earth fascinates me more than the caterpillar on its journey to become its destiny—the butterfly. What an awesome metaphor for moving toward our spiritual destiny, flying on the wings of spirit. But, as anyone knows who has asked for guidance on this spiritual journey, it’s not an easy one. Like the caterpillar starting off crawling close to the earth, our minds and bodies have a primal inclination, a preeminent surge toward the hunger of an animal, rather than a spirit having a predilection for open air and unfathomable skies. To that end, I look to the butterfly for wisdom.

The caterpillar doesn’t spend much time on earth crawling around. In fact, it’s main destiny is to find a secure place to gestate (meditate), wrapped in its own silken safety.  When it finds this place, it doesn’t ask questions, it simply waits for transformation to take place—in the silence—in the present. I have often felt the silence of a cocoon and thought, perhaps, my wings were forming, spiritually. However, when I desired to fly, I fell straight on to my face.
I once watched a butterfly eat its way out of a cocoon and then try to fly. At first, it couldn’t take flight. Actually, I had never seen a butterfly so large and beautiful. With colors from brown to green, exotic and lovely, it was the size of a small bird. I accepted the challenge of helping it. It hopped on to my finger without despair or fear. I walked to the front yard where many trees flourished in the spring wind. Suddenly, its moist wings began to dry in the sun and it flapped them, as I carefully balanced it on my finger.

With one swift move, the butterfly jumped off of my finger and began to fly. I will always remember that moment, as I realized sometimes even the master’s work needs a little nudge to move to its destiny. In that moment, I was an angel for that butterfly. It never looked back or came around for a visit. It simply went on to its destiny in the boundless blue sky, hopping from tree to tree, from beautiful flower to beautiful flower.

I know, someday, for all of us, that our wings will grow strong like the butterfly. But, I am also praying, that on our journey toward that day that we don’t tarry as we find our place of refuge in meditation and prayer. For there we will begin the amazing metamorphosis to our ultimate destiny.

***
I am moving to Southern Florida to begin a new small imprint publishing company called: Finding Authentic You Publishing: findingauthenticyoupublishing.com. I am accepting submissions now for my January 2015 bookshelf. If you or any friends are interested, please go to the website and read the submission guidelines. Thanks.
Finding Authentic You is my brand and is also a self-help guide, which I wrote, with 365 Discoveries, meant to aid you in facilitating some of life’s most difficult challenges, like sleep. But, the discoveries also lead you to what you believe spiritually, understanding your goals, learning to believe in your self, discovering the most distinct you, unlocking all of your negative thinking, and helping you replace it with positive, creative thought using many different modalities, including hypnosis, prayer, and psychology. Once you know yourself, then relationship with Spirit and people is a fairly easy task.

For much more information about finding out about the psychology of the human mind and being your authentic self, self-love, and self-esteem, check out my new book below. “Finding Authentic You” will answer many of the questions I propose above. The book also has many discoveries about health, both mental and physical, as well as spiritual discoveries to lead you to your highest and best! Thanks for being a part of my tribe and helping me make this book be a Bestseller.

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding%20authentic%20you&sprefix=finding+%2Caps&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Afinding%20authentic%20you


Finding Authentic You: With 365 Daily Discoveries & 7 Steps to Effective Change

* Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or http://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed. Please spread the word by liking the page or sharing this with your friends.

Do You See with Your Mind or Your Heart? #idols #spiritualeye #relationshipadvice

Do You See with Your Mind or Your Heart?
#idols #spiritualeye #relationshipadvice

I have always been a person who thought he perceived with his heart, then with his eyes. But, I have realized that even when my intention is to give every person I meet a chance, I can fall prey to the unworthy countenance of my own judgment from looks alone.

I’ve had the great fortune lately of “seeing” someone who is not only beautiful inside, but is very handsome too. I have dated good-looking men before, but not the type that look as if they came out of a Men’s Fitness Magazine. I thought it would be an interesting experiment to see if an amazing description of a compassionate person would supersede a smoldering picture of him. From the comments and personal messages on Facebook, clearly, most people thought someone this handsome could not be real. Other friends were happy about my new “friendship,” but tentative and untrusting. I had to ask myself the question, why?
The truth is: We are all a little weary of guys and gals who are model types. We feel that they must be a bit shallow, simply because they spend so much time working on their muscles at the gym. Personally, I have felt much the same way about entering into a relationship with a very handsome, well-built man, especially, since I have done so and have been hurt by narcissism. But, from the perception of the person who has been looked at like a piece of meat, he or she usually ends up with someone who is real, compassionate, and loving, and probably not at all that interested in the fantasy of what their perspective date looks like.

I have a very good friend who is drop dead gorgeous. I have never seen him date anyone handsome. He dates geeky, skinny men and never men who approach him, first. He has always looked for the guy who would never believe someone as handsome as he would be attracted to him. Perhaps, there is a good reason for that decision. He probably, in the past, has had men drooling over him and didn’t see him as a human with emotional needs. Often, men in bars and on the street look at him as a body, not a human. And, from the beautiful person’s perspective, life isn’t very rewarding; when they have to prove their self-worth to everyone they meet.

I have met a bunch of movie- and TV stars in my day. The ones who have been nice have been the ones who recognized I didn’t give a hoot that they were famous. If we look at people with our hearts, we are bound to get a different, spiritual perception of them, than if we look with our human eyes. Eyes can deceive, very easily. This truth goes as far back as the days of Jesus. In Matthew 6 we hear: “The eye is the lamp of the body. So if your eye is healthy, your whole body will be full of light.”

We can see in this scripture because the word eye is not plural that Matthew speaks about our spiritual eye, not our visual eyes. In many other scriptures we can see that our spiritual growth happens when we look beyond the confines of our human eyes to a spiritual world, far greater, much more mystical, and hidden from those who never seek to look with the eye of his/her spirit.

So, how many friends do you have who are not of the same ilk as you? I remember a gentleman came up to me about ten years ago and said—about the people who sat in my pew at church with me, “Oh, you sit with the pretty people!” Immediately, I understood that he thought I wouldn’t or couldn’t be his friend because he wasn’t of the same ilk as I, which was so not the case.

After that, at church, and in life, I have made a concerted effort to invite all different types of people into my life. All different types of people have something special to offer to our lives, if we let them in.

***
I am moving to Southern Florida to begin a new small imprint publishing company called: Finding Authentic You Publishing: findingauthenticyoupublishing.com. I am accepting submissions now for my January 2015 bookshelf. If you or any friends are interested, please go to the website and read the submission guidelines. Thanks.
Finding Authentic You is my brand and is also a self-help guide, which I wrote, with 365 Discoveries, meant to aid you in facilitating some of life’s most difficult challenges, like sleep. But, the discoveries also lead you to what you believe spiritually, understanding your goals, learning to believe in your self, discovering the most distinct you, unlocking all of your negative thinking, and helping you replace it with positive, creative thought using many different modalities, including hypnosis, prayer, and psychology. Once you know yourself, then relationship with Spirit and people is a fairly easy task.
For much more information about finding out about the psychology of the human mind and being your authentic self, self-love, and self-esteem, check out my new book below. “Finding Authentic You” will answer many of the questions I propose above. The book also has many discoveries about health, both mental and physical, as well as spiritual discoveries to lead you to your highest and best! Thanks for being a part of my tribe and helping me make this book be a Bestseller.
http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding%20authentic%20you&sprefix=finding+%2Caps&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Afinding%20authentic%20you

Finding Authentic You: With 365 Daily Discoveries & 7 Steps to Effective Change

* Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or http://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed. Please spread the word by liking the page or sharing this with your friends.

Sewing on a New Button #endings #memorialday #divorce #death

Sewing on a New Button
#endings #memorialday #divorce #death

As I proceed to a new day, remembering the people who have passed, I still think of my friend, Michael’s, words: Endings comes in ways we can’t arrange.” Endings are like a button that falls off for no reason. One day, after the shirt hangs in your closet for a while, with no button, you decide to take it out, remembering how much you enjoyed wearing it. You choose to sew a new button on, so that you can wear it again. I believe that the memory of the past has to be like this metaphor. We have to be able to see the good in the past to fully be able to wear it proudly again. And the button you choose to sew on is likened to a new, positive outlook added to that memory.
I have a friend Linda who has been gone from my life for four years from very fatal colon cancer. I say have, because I don’t see her as gone from my life. I’ll explain later in this blog. She and I were connected at the hip for our entire friendship. She understood me like few people do. She was unlike anyone I knew. She was a lawyer, a very deductive and precise thinker. But, she had a spiritual outlook that often tipped me off of my stationary scales of ideas and beliefs. I like the quality in a friend who makes you reconsider what you believe daily, not in a contentious way, but a loving compassionate way.

I remember when she moved away to Colorado Springs, because she couldn’t overcome any sickness—at that time, she didn’t realize it was probably the beginning of the cancer. She called me one day completely excited. “I have the best idea,” she said. “There is a writer’s conference in Colorado Springs, a couple blocks from where I live. It is one of the best in the world. You could go to the conference with me, and we can have fun for a week!”

This was a great idea. I had been a fledgling writer, didn’t have 13 books published as I do now, and enjoyed going to writers’ conferences once or twice a year to boost my ego and meet agents and publishers. So, I went to the conference in the spring of 2000. At that conference, I was chosen to read a short story in a workshop that would be facilitated by the publisher that acquired my first two books. So, I know for certain that Linda’s life helped me in more ways than either of us knew, at that time. She did get to see the first book published, before she died. For that, I was very thankful to God.

I say that she is still a friend, because one evening after she passed into the ethers, she appeared to me as in a dream. She had bought me a small silver bell for Christmas one year. As we talked, she asked me to ring the silver bell whenever I wanted to talk with her. In that moment, I thought, I have no idea where I put that bell.

In fact, I hadn’t seen the bell since I moved into my new home two years prior to that. However, when I awoke the next morning, the bell was on my nightstand, as if it were there the entire time. I was astonished and, also, relieved that Linda would still be with me throughout my life and into eternity as an angel. I do believe in angels and spirits helping us and showing us truth from above and beyond.
I now believe that everyone I know who has gone on before me into the heavenly realm has the possibility of being an angel from the other side. For that, this Memorial Day becomes a time for me to rejoice in the spiritual realm for all those who have moved forward before me into their spiritual growth outside the human body. Now, they can be angels from the other side, knowing us in ways no other spirits could. For that, I give thanks on this Memorial Day.

***
I am moving to Southern Florida to begin a new small imprint publishing company called: Finding Authentic You Publishing: findingauthenticyoupublishing.com. I am accepting submissions now for my January 2015 bookshelf. If you or any friends are interested, please go to the website and read the submission guidelines. Thanks.
Finding Authentic You is my brand and is also a self-help guide, which I wrote, with 365 Discoveries, meant to aid you in facilitating some of life’s most difficult challenges, like sleep. But, the discoveries also lead you to what you believe spiritually, understanding your goals, learning to believe in your self, discovering the most distinct you, unlocking all of your negative thinking, and helping you replace it with positive, creative thought using many different modalities, including hypnosis, prayer, and psychology. Once you know yourself, then relationship with Spirit and people is a fairly easy task.

For much more information about finding out about the psychology of the human mind and being your authentic self, self-love, and self-esteem, check out my new book below. “Finding Authentic You” will answer many of the questions I propose above. The book also has many discoveries about health, both mental and physical, as well as spiritual discoveries to lead you to your highest and best! Thanks for being a part of my tribe and helping me make this book be a Bestseller.

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding%20authentic%20you&sprefix=finding+%2Caps&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Afinding%20authentic%20you

Finding Authentic You: With 365 Daily Discoveries & 7 Steps to Effective Change

* Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or http://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed. Please spread the word by liking the page or sharing this with your friends.

A Crystal in the Midst of Chaos #endings #relationshipadvice #divorce #death

A Crystal in the Midst of Chaos
#endings #relationshipadvice #divorce #death

“Ending come in ways we can’t arrange,” Mike said compassionately, as I described trying to put commas and periods, and, perhaps, even exclamation points at the end of sentences in my life, as I prepare to move to Florida. Mr. Lutz’s advice was so much deeper than I expected in that moment, it brought me to a pause in the conversation, so that I could adjust my own thinking to all that transpired around me. In what parts of our lives do we actually have total control? I can think of only one thing: how we think about what’s happening to us. So, if we are in a universe where the only objective is to think correctly, then we have to submerge into the idea that life and relationships take their course when its time, and all we can do is wrap our minds around this changing, forward movement.

I think of a time in my life when an amazing friend passed away. Well, he didn’t just pass away. He took his life. The ending to that relationship was completely out of my hands and also out of the control of everyone from his best friends, to his partner and family. That time was trying for everyone. But I, also, remember turning the corner in my mind, midway through the trials, and realizing that my friend had left an amazing legacy and opportunity for 100 or so people to come together in love in a way I had never experienced before. We laughed. We cried. We played games to take our mind off of the reality of the situation, we drank to ease the sting, and we talked of God and Spirit as if nothing held back the gushing of our hearts. Those three days with my friends are the most important three days of my life to date.

Now, interestingly, most of the people who were involved with the funeral are not presently in my life. My ex-partner has been remarried for 10 years, my close friends have made new close friends, and a couple people have moved away. I’ve even lost touch and have no idea where one friend is. But, my point is that life changes like the seasons. We don’t get to tell God or the universe to stop moving and reshaping the world. We only get to witness that which happens in the Now. We can either love it or hate it. Neither of which matters, except if you want to have a peaceful and prosperous life.

If you want to accept that which is, you have the opportunity to also build a new perception and reality around the present in your mind, as well. Dreaming and believing are also choices humans get to have. Often times, you will see that what you have believed in your mind—bad or good—will come into fruition. The energy we place on our thoughts brings forth action. Action changes lives. Most importantly, it changes your purpose and destiny to one of a peaceful warrior who lives like a crystal in the midst of chaos.

***

I am moving to Southern Florida to begin a new small imprint publishing company called: Finding Authentic You Publishing: findingauthenticyoupublishing.com. I am accepting submissions now for my January 2015 bookshelf. If you or any friends are interested, please go to the website and read the submission guidelines. Thanks.
Finding Authentic You is my brand and is also a self-help guide, which I wrote, with 365 Discoveries, meant to aid you in facilitating some of life’s most difficult challenges, like sleep. But, the discoveries also lead you to what you believe spiritually, understanding your goals, learning to believe in your self, discovering the most distinct you, unlocking all of your negative thinking, and helping you replace it with positive, creative thought using many different modalities, including hypnosis, prayer, and psychology. Once you know yourself, then relationship with Spirit and people is a fairly easy task.

For much more information about finding out about the psychology of the human mind and being your authentic self, self-love, and self-esteem, check out my new book below. “Finding Authentic You” will answer many of the questions I propose above. The book also has many discoveries about health, both mental and physical, as well as spiritual discoveries to lead you to your highest and best! Thanks for being a part of my tribe and helping me make this book be a Bestseller.

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding%20authentic%20you&sprefix=finding+%2Caps&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Afinding%20authentic%20you

Finding Authentic You: With 365 Daily Discoveries & 7 Steps to Effective Change

* Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or http://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed. Please spread the word by liking the page or sharing this with your friends.

Recurring Flatulence: Normal? #farting #gas #flatulence

Recurring Flatulence: Normal?
#farting #gas #flatulence

Farting is not something people talk about unless they make a joke about it, yet it can be a really big problem socially, in relationship, and physically. Most of us have an occasional gas problem, especially when we eat foods that produce gas, such as potatoes, beans, broccoli, asparagus, anything in the cabbage family, wheat (a big problem), artichokes, onions, pears and milk. But, the real problem isn’t so much the gas, but the smell of the gas. Some people’s flatulence can go undetected, yet others smell up the room. I bet you don’t even know what makes gas smell sometimes and sometimes not. I know I didn’t until I researched it.

First of all, every person naturally lets off about 20 farts in a day, because that is just about how much gas an average person must release. The problem, however, is not the natural gas passing through the body, but when sulfates and bacteria add to this non-smelling gas, and poor digestion, then the gas takes on a very foul odor. You would think that the food that causes excessive gas would be the problem with the odor, but it’s not. The problem with odor forms with the gas is generally from foods with sulfates, such as broccoli, brussel sprouts, anything in the cabbage family, cauliflower, bok choy. Other foods rich in sulfur are meat, especially beef and pork, whole cow’s milk, garlic, onions, horseradish, and sulfite preserved foods such as wine and dried fruit. Sorry, wine drinkers. Your smelly gas might be because of the half bottle of wine you consume with dinner—that and the big, juicy steak. Leave that out and the gas from the beans won’t even smell.

I remember when I was about 28, I had a fiancée that told me that, if I didn’t go to the doctors because of my bad smelling gas, she was going to drag me by my ear. I did end up going, and much to both of our dismay, at that time, the doctor didn’t even know what caused bad smelling gas. He gave me some antacid and told me to lay off of the meat, which really is one of the primary causes of the foul of gas. However, I spent the next 17 years a vegetarian, and little changed. In fact, the sulfate problem with the cabbage-like vegetables kicked bigger than the meat problem.

When I really saw a major difference in the bloating and gas was when I got off of wheat and wheat products entirely. Yes, I’d have to say that wheat was the cause of 90% of my stomach problems, now that I look back. I simply loved bread and pasta more than any other food. I remember telling friends I could live on a cheese and fruit plate with Italian bread. After becoming gluten free, I have had much less odorous gas and much less acidy feeling in my abdomen and in my intestines. Hallelujah, Jesus! There was a cure after all.

Going gluten free isn’t such a problem as most people think. The gluten-free industry is now a 5 billion dollar industry and growing exponentially, daily. Most of my good friends and family are now gluten free. The extra money you spend on the gluten free products, such as bread, pasta, and baking mixes, are small compared to the difference in the way you feel, the decreased bloating in your stomach, and the weight you automatically lose just by watching the wheat. The greatest benefit is that the craving for sweets diminishes with time, and you find yourself picking healthier choices without even realizing it. I recommend it highly.

***
I am moving to Southern Florida to begin a new small imprint publishing company called: Finding Authentic You Publishing: findingauthenticyou-publishing.com. I am accepting submissions now for my January 2015 bookshelf. If you or any friends are interested, please go to the website and read the submission guidelines. Thanks.

Finding Authentic You is my brand and is also a self-help guide, which I wrote, with 365 Discoveries, meant to aid you in facilitating some of life’s most difficult challenges, like sleep. But, the discoveries also lead you to what you believe spiritually, understanding your goals, learning to believe in your self, discovering the most distinct you, unlocking all of your negative thinking, and helping you replace it with positive, creative thought using many different modalities, including hypnosis, prayer, and psychology. Once you know yourself, then relationship with Spirit and people is a fairly easy task.
For much more information about finding out about the psychology of the human mind and being your authentic self, self-love, and self-esteem, check out my new book below. “Finding Authentic You” will answer many of the questions I propose above. The book also has many discoveries about health, both mental and physical, as well as spiritual discoveries to lead you to your highest and best! Thanks for being a part of my tribe and helping me make this book be a Bestseller.

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding%20authentic%20you&sprefix=finding+%2Caps&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Afinding%20authentic%20you


Finding Authentic You: With 365 Daily Discoveries & 7 Steps to Effective Change

* Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or http://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed. Please spread the word by liking the page or sharing this with your friends.

The Leaving Cellar—Free for the Next Four Days on Amazon Kindle #theleavingcellar

The Leaving Cellar—Free for the Next Four Days
on Amazon Kindle #theleavingcellar

My novel, “The Leaving Cellar is going to be free on Amazon Kindle for the next four days as a promotion. Get yourself a copy while you can. Here is a small taste of its delicious content:

     I was never much of a spiritual kind of guy. I always left that up to my wife, Vada. She came from Catholic folk and had more statues in the house than I cared to admit. After forty-five years of marriage, I finally made her take the statue of the Blessed Virgin on the half-shell out of the front yard, because the neighbor boys liked using it for sling shot practice after dark. Little did I know that gluing that dang Virgin’s head on to my neighbor’s front porch finial would be the start of a Shocking-Old-Man-of-Dixon-Tennessee legacy my entire family wished had never begun.

Despite my lack of religion, when a little voice woke me up in the middle of the night, “Jimmy. Jimmy, get up.” And it wasn’t Vada, and it wasn’t my dog. Let me tell you, I listened—and I listened but good.
It took me a few minutes to stir,, though. See, we call the dog, Jimmy, and almost everybody else calls me Jimmy Joe, except for those two darn statue-bustin’ neighbor boys, who call me Mista WillyMays, instead of Willimay. I tossed and turned, thinking I was dreaming. Fifteen minutes passed before I actually got up and went to the back porch, where I usually have my midnight smoke. Well, that night, I didn’t have any appetite for cigarettes. I kept hearing that darn voice in my head calling my name.

I sat down on my rocking chair, still kind of in a daze. I closed my eyes and listened to the crickets. They’re awfully quiet in these parts come spring; then they get louder as the summer comes along. Just as I was about to fall asleep, I heard the voice again. “You think you’re some kind of hero for saving Buddy from his daddy? Well, you’re not.”
I didn’t answer back.

The voice continued, “I haven’t put you on this earth to save Buddy’s soul. Only he can do that. I put you here to save yourself—from yourself.”

Heaviness came over me. My body felt glued to the chair. I had the same kind of feeling when Buddy told me he liked kissing his high school buddy Thatcher more than girls.
See, my best friend, Carter Edgefield, tried to kill his only son, Buddy, on Good Friday. Somebody down at Melrose Lanes called Carter just short of midnight and told him Buddy was doing something he shouldn’t be doing in a parked car behind the lanes. Old Carter put on his overalls, grabbed a baseball bat, and the rest was Tennessee history. But, the only ones who actually knew what happened that night were Buddy and me.

In that second of life, fate pried open my heart and made me take a good hard look at the path of indifference I’d been walking—well, more like standing on. See, Dixon was the kind of town that didn’t much like detours from the middle of the road, even with a name like Dixon, which any born Dixonite can tell you is heartburn to the polite and a Tums to the wicked.

You see, I was the one in the parked car with Buddy when Carter single-handedly cracked open the lie I’d been living with one deliberate blow to the windshield of my mint-condition ’89 Impala. But, it ain’t what you’re thinking. It ain’t what anyone who knew me should have been thinking.

That’s my point. Carter never stopped to ask why I was consoling his only child. If he had, though, I could never have told him. What Buddy told me was a secret, and I’ve never been one to blab, not even to my best friend.
I think folks with secrets stick together. I know that for sure, because I’ve heard things I can’t repeat from twenty or so Dixonites in the long stretch of my sixty-three years. Only thing is, when Buddy confessed his sin—I saw for the first time—that I had been living somebody else’s idea of a life, not mine.

I’d thought to myself, don’t say it, Buddy! Don’t even speak it, Buddy! But, there it was—right out in the open for God to know and hear.

He spoke in gushes. “I think I’m gay. Gay and scared. Scared I’m going to die from AIDS, and even more scared God’s going to kill me, first.”

From that moment, I was changed. My sudden quiet defiance of the unspoken law of intolerance practically got me killed that night, and later, nearly landed me in to the arms of another woman. Both times, a power greater than I plucked me out of harm’s way and kept me alive to tell about it.

What I did in front of Buddy that night, I don’t remember ever doing before in front of anyone. I cried. Sixty-some years of held-back tears made a fussing mess all down my face. Then, I reached out to hold him. The young man looked so helpless there nesting his scared, little head right on my chest.

God doesn’t hate you, son. He couldn’t.” I patted him on the back. “You’re kind and caring. Why, you’ve got to be the most polite young man I know. If I could see that, surely God Almighty can. If He can’t, I don’t want no part of Him—or religion.”

Just as the words came out of my mouth, Old Carter’s two-by-four came crashing down, like maybe God had heard me, and he wasn’t happy about what I’d said.

I grabbed my hunting rifle out of the back seat and pointed it at that crazy son of a bitch. We haven’t spoken since. Haven’t spoken to Buddy neither.

You see, men with secrets can hardly face themselves, let alone face each other. That’s why I’m telling you this. ‘Cause every one of us has got to wake up and see the truth.

I know that now.

***
I am moving to Southern Florida to begin a new small imprint publishing company called: Finding Authentic You Publishing: findingauthenticyou-publishing.com. I am accepting submissions now for my January 2015 bookshelf. If you or any friends are interested, please go to the website and read the submission guidelines. Thanks.

Finding Authentic You is my brand and is also a self-help guide, which I wrote, with 365 Discoveries, meant to aid you in facilitating some of life’s most difficult challenges, like sleep. But, the discoveries also lead you to what you believe spiritually, understanding your goals, learning to believe in your self, discovering the most distinct you, unlocking all of your negative thinking, and helping you replace it with positive, creative thought using many different modalities, including hypnosis, prayer, and psychology. Once you know yourself, then relationship with Spirit and people is a fairly easy task.

For much more information about finding out about the psychology of the human mind and being your authentic self, self-love, and self-esteem, check out my new book below. “Finding Authentic You” will answer many of the questions I propose above. The book also has many discoveries about health, both mental and physical, as well as spiritual discoveries to lead you to your highest and best! Thanks for being a part of my tribe and helping me make this book be a Bestseller.

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding%20authentic%20you&sprefix=finding+%2Caps&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Afinding%20authentic%20you


Finding Authentic You: With 365 Daily Discoveries & 7 Steps to Effective Change

* Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or http://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed. Please spread the word by liking the page or sharing this with your friends.

“I’d Rather Walk on My Lips, Than Gossip” #gossip #talkingdirt #kathygriffin #joanrivers #olympiadukakis

“I’d Rather Walk on My Lips, Than Gossip”
#gossip #talkingdirt #kathygriffin #joanrivers #olympiadukakis

Who can forget the quip Olympia Dukakis delivered in “Steel Magnolias, “I’d rather walk on my lips than gossip…” Then, of course, she went on to share some dirt her nemesis. We don’t often think twice when we spread other’s people’s bad or good news without regard to their feelings or desire to share it themselves. I would guess that 99% of all people are guilty of gossip, including me. I find it difficult to keep what I know locked in my vault—as one friend calls it, who definitely can keep a secret. For me, my life is so out there for everyone to know and hear about, I often forget that other people have safer boundaries than I. I’m committed to being better about gossip in the future, mostly because of some recent gossip I heard about little ole me.

We watch the news or a talk shows like “Chelsea Lately,” and, without a doubt, the reason we turned it on was to hear about other people’s shortcomings. When we get wind of another person’s faults or depraved actions, we just don’t feel so bad about ourselves. Also, starting way back with comedians like Joan Rivers and, now, Kathy Griffin, we laugh at their bareback details about everyone from politicians to movie actors sex, lies and video tapes. I have to admit it, I bought tickets for Kathy’s show when she was in town. Every gay person I knew was there. She loves her gay men. She calls us “her gays.” We love Kathy Griffin because she tends to tell a story holding back no minor, intrinsic detail. But, is honesty truly funny, when it’s at the expense of another person?

My friend Sharon and I were talking recently about the southern way of sharing a story without poking fun. Especially older southern women bred to be ladies, use words like “the poor dear” and “precious should know better…” before an exhaustive betrayal of trust and probably something scathing about a hairdo or an outfit, or worse yet, someone’s gaining weight. We can’t help ourselves sometimes. But, no matter if it comes with the southern mask of fake compassion or a blatant truth like Chelsea Handler, neither is comforting if you think that you may be the next one to be talked about.

In the past, I have had rumors spread about me that were simply the furthest from the truth. Some stories that were spread never even happened. I could understand an untruth, if someone got a part of a truth a little eschew. But, when a complete untruth is told about you, you begin to rethink your take on gossip. For me, I try hard to bite my tongue if I know someone would be hurt in the transaction of my words. Sometimes, you know it’s just comical to poke fun.

But, I can remember a group of friends I would hang around with. Out of the ten, one woman would always get singled out for gossip. “She’s such a bitch! She drives me crazy. Can you believe what she said?” I can’t tell you how many times I defended her. Yet, the group managed to stay together, even though the schisms of gossip could have easily pulled each of them in different directions, if any of them had an idea of what had been said, most especially, the one girl.

Many years later and sans moi, this particular girl, who hadn’t spoken with me for four years, recently wrote to me to say goodbye. In her letter, she said that the reason why she hadn’t been in my life was because I could never support her, as she had always supported me.

I didn’t have the heart to tell her, I was the only one supporting her. When I would try to solicit business for her, most of my friends would look at me with a quizzical glare and say, “Really?” In fact, often, friends would call at an invitation to one of my parties, ask if she were there, and beg out because they didn’t want to be around her. How do you tell a friend so many people dislike her? I guess you don’t, which is probably why people talked behind her back. As I said, she maintained all of the other friendships, those of whom couldn’t care less about her breaking heart, and she dismissed the one person who truly loved her. For that, I feel sorry for her.

But, I digress. Just don’t gossip. It’s not good for the soul.

News: I am moving to Southern Florida to begin a new small imprint publishing company called: Finding Authentic You Publishing: findingauthenticyou-publishing.com. I am accepting submissions now for my January 2015 bookshelf. If you or any friends are interested, please go to the website and read the submission guidelines. Thanks.

Finding Authentic You is my brand and is also a self-help guide, which I wrote, with 365 Discoveries, meant to aid you in facilitating some of life’s most difficult challenges, like sleep. But, the discoveries also lead you to what you believe spiritually, understanding your goals, learning to believe in your self, discovering the most distinct you, unlocking all of your negative thinking, and helping you replace it with positive, creative thought using many different modalities, including hypnosis, prayer, and psychology. Once you know yourself, then relationship with Spirit and people is a fairly easy task.

For much more information about finding out about the psychology of the human mind and being your authentic self, self-love, and self-esteem, check out my new book below. “Finding Authentic You” will answer many of the questions I propose above. The book also has many discoveries about health, both mental and physical, as well as spiritual discoveries to lead you to your highest and best! Thanks for being a part of my tribe and helping me make this book be a Bestseller.

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding%20authentic%20you&sprefix=finding+%2Caps&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Afinding%20authentic%20you

Finding Authentic You: With 365 Daily Discoveries & 7 Steps to Effective Change

* Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or http://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed. Please spread the word by liking the page or sharing this with your friends.

Betrayed! #lossofafriend #loss #relationshipadvice

The reptilian part of our brain acts in the Fight or Flight mode when faced with a situation that appears dangerous. This impulse supersedes all parts of the thinking, deductive brain. Cortisol and adrenaline rush to the brain, then to the blood stream causing an anxious desire to bail out, rush forward to safety, and leave a harmful situation. This same act happens when we meet betrayal in our lives. All of the same chemicals in our body are triggered in a moment’s notice at any sign of betrayal, because that’s what a human mind has been programmed to do. Add to this, a gut response, some subconscious desires that have been birthed in our “black box” to think that everyone who loves us will leave us, that doom is around every corner, and that no good will ever come of any situation; then, we have a recipe for avoidant relationship behavior that will be hard to maneuver.

Picture this: You have been in love with someone for ten years. You have given your life for this person. One day, through an email he/she left sitting open in the office that this perceived “love of your life” is not only having an affair with your best friend, but is also in love. Suddenly, every anxious fire that had been simmering for years rises to the surface to protect your self from further harm. You get furious and change the locks. You throw her clothes out on the lawn. You break his favorite statue. You tell his/her best friends and may even try to hurt a position at work. You are angry and want revenge. Betrayal initially causes all of these emotions. I have been there. I know. Add to that, the feeling of wanting to murder. Yes, even the most rash instinctive ideas will appeal to the brain’s dysfunction in those moments. I wonder, if I had had a gun and the means to do harm, if I actually would have in the moment of betrayal. I hope I wouldn’t have, but I know I wanted to do harm.

I am a peaceful, compassionate person, by nature. I had never even remotely felt any feelings such as what came up when I had been betrayed. I felt cornered, like a puppy dog knowing he has to go to the vet for his yearly shots. He just knows and will hide under that bed until you get the broom to sweep him out from under the bed. He’ll growl and snarl at you, showing his teeth, even though you are his sole means of food and water and shelter. He doesn’t think about the reciprocity of hurting his owner. He only wants to protect himself from danger. I have a little dog. Last week, I put him on a plane with my mother to move him to Florida. He has been acting out ever since. He is not happy about me not being present. He is not happy my sister is taking care of him until I move there. She says he poops on the floor right after a walk. My dog never does those kinds of things. He’s just angry and confused. He even chewed out of a brand new carrier on the plane, which I’d have to believe was like Svengali, and made the entire Southwest 45 minutes late from leaving the airport, because the stewardess had to buy a new one for my mother before they could take off.

We can learn a lot about our reptilian brain by watching an animal in a state of fear or even one that is hungry and will kill for food. The basic human instinct is much the same, programmed by life’s hardships and also with chemical impulses that supersede the frontal, deductive lobes of the brain.

After the chemicals release from the body, you do become rational again. Yes, later, I realized that the betrayal in my life was for my better good. I learned to live with the past. I accepted my part of the problem. I tried to grow from my mistakes. But, don’t think that every time I get into any kind of relationship, that this same basic instinct of betrayal tries to rear its ugly head and keep me from getting hurt again. It does.

I wrote a novel, “Fatal Virtues” about a fatal betrayal and how it can take the most intrinsically good person and change her ideas of God and Spirit. Only the strong rises up above the challenge of our human paradigm and remains steadfast in his/her authentic self. I hope you have a chance to read it.

I am moving to Southern Florida to begin a new small imprint publishing company called: Finding Authentic You Publishing: findingauthenticyou-publishing.com. I am accepting submissions now for my January 2015 bookshelf. If you or any friends are interested, please go to the website and read the submission guidelines. Thanks.
Finding Authentic You is my brand and is also a self-help guide, which I wrote, with 365 Discoveries, meant to aid you in facilitating some of life’s most difficult challenges, like sleep. But, the discoveries also lead you to what you believe spiritually, understanding your goals, learning to believe in your self, discovering the most distinct you, unlocking all of your negative thinking, and helping you replace it with positive, creative thought using many different modalities, including hypnosis, prayer, and psychology. Once you know yourself, then relationship with Spirit and people is a fairly easy task.

For much more information about finding out about the psychology of the human mind and being your authentic self, self-love, and self-esteem, check out my new book below. “Finding Authentic You” will answer many of the questions I propose above. The book also has many discoveries about health, both mental and physical, as well as spiritual discoveries to lead you to your highest and best! Thanks for being a part of my tribe and helping me make this book be a Bestseller.

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding+authentic+you&sprefix=finding+%2Caps&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Afinding+authentic+you


Finding Authentic You: With 365 Daily Discoveries & 7 Steps to Effective Change

* Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 orhttp://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed. Please spread the word by liking the page or sharing this with your friends.

The Loss of a Dream #IamMe #loss #relationshipadvice

The Loss of a Dream #IamMe #loss #relationshipadvice

When met with a flagrant attempt to dismantle your peace and compassion, the only action to take is to assert your true self, not the old person a coworker, a family member, a spouse or partner tries desperately to conjure from your past. Today, I had a ex-long-term partner of eight years tell me that he didn’t want to see me before I went to Florida. His first two letters to me were open and honest, and he seemed anxious to want to get together. I haven’t seen this man in 3-4 years. I wasn’t sure I wanted to reengage, but we had had eight years together, and seven of which were some of the most loving years of my life. I felt we owed it to one another to say goodbye. Later that evening, I got an a curt e-mail from him that said simply, “I don’t believe we should get together. Have a nice life!”

Now, though his act was unkind, in my estimation, it should solicit a change in my essential behavior. Life often seems to be a game of power. When someone deserts a position to throw you off of your guard, this is an attempt to gain back his/her power, something, apparently, he had thought he’d lost. My initial response was a simple, “Okay.” Although, to be honest, I seethed for a short time, before I realized my heart was hurt, not angry. So, I wrote back to him with a letter that explained my true feelings. One thing is for sure, what I miss about him is not who he is now. What I miss about him is who we both were when we were in relationship together the first seven years.

Most of the time our pain isn’t about the person we engaged with in our past relationships. Our pain is more connected to the loss of what we dreamed we would have or could have had with that person. Sometimes, pain is simply the loss of a dream. The person is, and probably has always been the person he or she is now. But, you just didn’t see it clearly, because it was masked or shrouded in your fantasy.

When I go back to this old relationship, we had many good times and shared a life with many super wonderful friends. But, today, none of those people are the same, nor am I. We have all grown and taken on a different persona. I have gone on to be transparent and forthright. This offends a lot of people, especially in the south. I believe more friends enjoy my company because of my honesty, than supposed friends would had enjoyed my company because of a mask of congeniality. So, I settle with dismantling old, masked relationships, so that I can make room for the people in my life who can make a spiritual and relationship impact that is worthy of my time and energy.

I hope you find it in yourself to face your demons, even if they are hidden in past love and hurt. Once we discover the source of our pain, dismantling the lies that surround our hurt are easy to diffuse, like a bomb set to go off in seconds, with only the disconnection of one wire keeping you from disaster or a true and honest life! You choose.
I am moving to Southern Florida to begin a new small imprint publishing company called: Finding Authentic You Publishing: findingauthenticyou-publishing.com. I am accepting submissions now for my January 2015 bookshelf. If you or any friends are interested, please go to the website and read the submission guidelines. Thanks.

Finding Authentic You is my brand and is also a self-help guide, which I wrote, with 365 Discoveries, meant to aid you in facilitating some of life’s most difficult challenges, like sleep. But, the discoveries also lead you to what you believe spiritually, understanding your goals, learning to believe in your self, discovering the most distinct you, unlocking all of your negative thinking, and helping you replace it with positive, creative thought using many different modalities, including hypnosis, prayer, and psychology. Once you know yourself, then relationship with Spirit and people is a fairly easy task.

For much more information about finding out about the psychology of the human mind and being your authentic self, self-love, and self-esteem, check out my new book below. “Finding Authentic You” will answer many of the questions I propose above. The book also has many discoveries about health, both mental and physical, as well as spiritual discoveries to lead you to your highest and best! Thanks for being a part of my tribe and helping me make this book be a Bestseller.

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding%20authentic%20you&sprefix=finding+%2Caps&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Afinding%20authentic%20you

Finding Authentic You: With 365 Daily Discoveries & 7 Steps to Effective Change

* Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or http://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed. Please spread the word by liking the page or sharing this with your friends.

The Black Box #blackbox #humanmind

The Black Box #blackbox #humanmind

All the answers to life’s hardest questions come down to two words: Black Box. When a plane crashes, we search for the black box, a computer that shares everything that happened on that plane before it crashed; its path, what buttons were pressed, voices in the cockpit, and any problems with the mechanics.

But, as we can see in the new television show “Black Box,” the brain is also considered a black box in psychological circles, because no one really knows what happens in the brain’s circuitry to cause it to malfunction. If only we could access it completely, we could begin to decipher the problems that many people have mentally and physically, as the brain is the governing center of all the body’s function.

I have had to solve a great many conundrums in my life, mine, my family’s, my client’s, and my friend’s problems. I’ve never once looked for a black box to discover what it was that could be the presiding problem in any of the issues. Have you? Beyond all problems in life a metaphoric mystery exists. We can call this mystery our little black box. We can either decide that the answers exist there or that the black box should be left untouched unless complete disaster happens. 

All of the answers to my life’s hardest questions have ended up great learning experiences. Had I accessed the power of the black box before these disasters, could I have circumvented the problem? Maybe I would have found proof of my own course of action, long before I wasted months grieving over something that simply was a malfunction or misdirection, at best. The black box seems to be what Spirit decided should be faith in the unknown of destiny. Because the black box isn’t accessed until the disaster, we rarely look for a problem before it happens. We go along on the surface of life, never searching for the deeper answers to life’s human predicament. 

I have recently made a friend with an unlikely Internet pen pal who seems to be an angel, providing answers to questions, sometimes before I ask them. He has spent fourteen years uncovering an addiction problem and searching for answers to life’s hardest questions from his little black box, and, perhaps, the black box governing the universe. His essential understanding of life has changed completely as a result of his resolve to look for a greater good watching over, handling, and giving him license to learn from mistakes in life. 

Since I have been a life coach for so many years, I don’t often depend on others to answer my hardest questions. But, for some reason, I’ve taken my trials in this semi-difficult move to Florida to my pen pal angel and let him give me answers. Every time, he seems to have greater insight into my problems than I do, which is baffling, but awesome at the same time. You see, this means that I am finally letting go of having to solve all of life’s problems myself, of having to be perfect so I can be loved, and, most importantly, thinking that because I’m following God’s supreme path that life should be easy. 
The human condition is never simple, even when you have access to the black box. When we discover the answer for plane crashes, we can’t go back and save the dead. We can only learn from the problems that happened. That’s always been the hope. So, too, the hope for our human condition is finding the reason for our problems and hoping to do a better job and managing them in the future.

I am moving to Southern Florida to begin a new small imprint publishing company called: Finding Authentic You Publishing: findingauthenticyou-publishing.com. I am accepting submissions now for my January 2015 bookshelf. If you or any friends are interested, please go to the website and read the submission guidelines. Thanks.

Finding Authentic You is my brand and is also a self-help guide, which I wrote, with 365 Discoveries, meant to aid you in facilitating some of life’s most difficult challenges, like sleep. But, the discoveries also lead you to what you believe spiritually, understanding your goals, learning to believe in your self, discovering the most distinct you, unlocking all of your negative thinking, and helping you replace it with positive, creative thought using many different modalities, including hypnosis, prayer, and psychology. Once you know yourself, then relationship with Spirit and people is a fairly easy task. 

For much more information about finding out about the psychology of the human mind and being your authentic self, self-love, and self-esteem, check out my new book below. “Finding Authentic You” will answer many of the questions I propose above. The book also has many discoveries about health, both mental and physical, as well as spiritual discoveries to lead you to your highest and best! Thanks for being a part of my tribe and helping me make this book be a Bestseller.
http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding%20authentic%20you&sprefix=finding+%2Caps&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Afinding%20authentic%20you


Finding Authentic You: With 365 Daily Discoveries & 7 Steps to Effective Change

* Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or http://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed. Please spread the word by liking the page or sharing this with your friends.

Let’s Talk Bluntly About Fat #weightloss #loseweight#weightgain #glutenfree

Let’s Talk Bluntly About Fat #weightloss #loseweight#weightgain #glutenfree

I have no bones about saying the word fat. In fact, admitting that you are overweight or fat is exactly what you have to do to make any kind of change in your behavior patterns. Now is the time to turn your body back to the healthy vessel it should be.

A staggering 68.5% of Americans are overweight and 38% are obese. The difference between overweight and obese is ratio of weight to height. Also, morbid obesity is a disease that is caused from having too much weight on your body, which manifests kidney, heart, liver, and muscular disease, not to mention the worse case of depression one can get. And don’t get me started about childhood obesity—also a staggering 38%, which is usually caused by parents who are obese. Can you imagine feeding your children the wrong food and causing them diabetes at a young age? This happens all the time, not because parents are generally careless, but because we are not educated about how and what to eat and what a child should to remain at a healthy weight. Eating and the computer age for children, with sedentary built into the equation, makes getting children to exercise also more difficult. Simply limit computer time to two hours a day. Your children will find something else more active to do.

In my estimation, after wrestling with some extra fat around my midsection for about five years, the problem was wheat gluten. You may think you want to stop here, but hear me out. You don’t have to give up bread or pasta to be gluten free. In fact, some of the gluten-free products are even better than the wheat products. Yes, you will have to give up beer and your beer gut, and, also, the only kind of vodka you can drink is a corn-based vodka called Titos, but you will find substitutes. I’m sure someone is already working on a great tasting beer for the near future that is gluten free.

I can honestly and say—forthright—that giving up gluten was easy. In fact, I barely even crave bread or sugary cakes or cookies anymore. If I have a sweet craving, I simply eat a gluten-free dessert. I’m not promoting sugar. I’m simply saying that giving up wheat isn’t the same as giving up dessert. This gluten-free business was a 5 billion dollar business last year, including cookies and cakes.

Businessmen expect the gluten-free business to double and triple in the coming years. Why? Because it works! Everyone I know who is successful at losing weight and keeping it off is on a gluten-free diet. And the benefits far outnumber the issue of spending a little extra money on the products.
As someone who is staying away from gluten, I feel my brain is functioning better, as there are fewer free radicals floating around up there in my noggin. My muscular problems, including arthritis, are so much better that I have been in 10 years. I have been able to do comfortably do yoga 6 days out of seven every week, included some more strenuous exercises, which wasn’t the case before I started.

Best news of all, in three months, starting out at 176 pounds, I am down to 156, and it happened without much effort at all. I am fitting into my slender clothes now and feel amazing about it, especially as I prepare to move, where shirtless is a mainstay.

I am moving to Southern Florida to begin a new small imprint publishing company called: Finding Authentic You Publishing: findingauthenticyou-publishing.com. I am accepting submissions now for my January 2015 bookshelf. If you or any friends are interested, please go to the website and read the submission guidelines. Thanks.

Finding Authentic You is my brand and is also a self-help guide, which I wrote, with 365 Discoveries, meant to aid you in facilitating some of life’s most difficult challenges, like sleep. But, the discoveries also lead you to what you believe spiritually, understanding your goals, learning to believe in your self, discovering the most distinct you, unlocking all of your negative thinking, and helping you replace it with positive, creative thought using many different modalities, including hypnosis, prayer, and psychology. Once you know yourself, then relationship with Spirit and people is a fairly easy task.

For much more information about finding out about the psychology of the human mind and being your authentic self, self-love, and self-esteem, check out my new book below. “Finding Authentic You” will answer many of the questions I propose above. The book also has many discoveries about health, both mental and physical, as well as spiritual discoveries to lead you to your highest and best! Thanks for being a part of my tribe and helping me make this book be a Bestseller.

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding+authentic+you&sprefix=finding+%2Caps&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Afinding+authentic+you


Finding Authentic You: With 365 Daily Discoveries & 7 Steps to Effective Change


* Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 orhttp://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed. Please spread the word by liking the page or sharing this with your friends. 

In My Parent's House #growingupreligious

In My Parent’s House

Many people, especially those dealing with mental health issues have found that much of their problems started at a young age. (This is not to say that parents and teachers didn’t do their best. This is simply explaining your subconscious mind and its working, based on the input of past experience.)

Let take an example of growing up in a very active and committed religious upbringing. Your father may have been a preacher or an elder in the church. Maybe your mother played the piano. You had two brothers and sisters. Suddenly, without even your parents realizing it, you became a show family, placed in the public’s eye for intense scrutiny. Your parents expected you to be the perfect children. When you weren’t, you saw the wrath of God in their eyes—before you ever found a spiritual connection to God.

You were the oldest child. As you grew, you realized that a group of teens in the church rebelled against their religious parents. Their behavior spoke to you, because you felt as if you had no voice or opinion in a house that was made of strict laws with no bending. So, you began to act out. You smoked cigarettes, drank alcohol, smoked pot, and had relationships with other church people, who were hiding in the closet. Church ended up being the perfect breeding grounds for all of your misdeeds and, unfortunately, your impending dysfunction.

I didn’t know this until very recently that 85% of all pedophiles are adults who manage, preach, or are elders in churches. So, to say that a church is a safe place for a young person is a complete misnomer. I went to a Catholic school where the nuns thought it was a great practice to actually wash out children’s mouths with real soap and water. They also would slam your fingers in a desk if you were talking out of turn. I’ve witnessed this, first hand. Perhaps, now, these things don’t happen, but we are talking about our childhood. These things happened when no effective governmental monitoring system was in place. So, we are left with the scars that came from such a tragic, overly religious background.

It, also, just so happened that the young priest who governed all of our extra curricular activities is now in jail for pedophilia. No one was safe in those times. My ideas of religion and spirituality were completely entangled in my thoughts of right and wrong. I had no idea a God or Spiritual Presence existed who actually loved me and wanted to guide me, until I had my own spiritual experience with that loving spirit. I thank God and my bleeding heart for that time in my life when I was searching for truth. Sometimes, that’s all it takes for Spirit to find you.

So, now our subconscious minds holds images and thoughts about spirit and parents that may not be the way you want to think now. If that’s true, you must allow these old thoughts to the surface and deal with them, and most importantly, create effective change. My book “Finding Authentic You,” can really help you with the psychology of change. I hope you can find it in your heart to loop for it, or any of my other self-help books or novels or meditation and healing Mp3s on Amazon and Amazon Kindle. Just type in my name to the search engine on Amazon: Bo Sebastian, you will find 21 different kinds of media, including my yoga DVD. Namaste.


To this information, I freely add that in July, I am moving to Southern Florida to begin a new small imprint publishing company called: Finding Authentic You Publishing: findingauthenticyou-publishing.com. I am accepting submissions now for my January 2015 bookshelf. If you or any friends are interested, please go to the website and read the submission guidelines. Thanks.

Finding Authentic You is my brand and is also a self-help guide, which I wrote, with 365 Discoveries, meant to aid you in facilitating some of life’s most difficult challenges, like sleep. But, the discoveries also lead you to what you believe spiritually, understanding your goals, learning to believe in your self, discovering the most distinct you, unlocking all of your negative thinking, and helping you replace it with positive, creative thought using many different modalities, including hypnosis, prayer, and psychology. Once you know yourself, then relationship with Spirit and people is a fairly easy task.

For much more information about finding out about the psychology of the human mind and being your authentic self, self-love, and self-esteem, check out my new book below. “Finding Authentic You” will answer many of the questions I propose above. The book also has many discoveries about health, both mental and physical, as well as spiritual discoveries to lead you to your highest and best! Thanks for being a part of my tribe and helping me make this book be a Bestseller.

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=finding%20authentic%20you&sprefix=finding+%2Caps&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Afinding%20authentic%20you


Finding Authentic You: With 365 Daily Discoveries & 7 Steps to Effective Change

* Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or http://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed. Please spread the word by liking the page or sharing this with your friends.