Flibbertigibbet

Flibbertigibbet

Flibbertigibbet is a Middle English word that usually means a flighty or whimsical person. I remember in The Sound of Music the term was used to describe the movie’s protagonist, Maria Von Trapp; especially, when she was trying to be a nun—a reclusive nun.

I used this example today because of all the times in our lives we feel we must do one thing, when our heart is leading us in a different direction. For Maria, she thought she had to be a nun, when even the Mother Superior realized, after a time, she was more suited to be a mother and wife. It took Mother Superior sending Sister Maria off to take care of ten children of a widower for Maria to understand her true calling was motherhood.

I look at my own life, especially in my career, and see the same scenario. I kept looking for what Casting Directors or Agents or Publishers would want to see from my work. I never took the time to write what was Authentically Me—until two years ago. Now I feel fulfilled and joy as I come to the computer to write every day, something that had eluded me for years.

I have many clients who were brought up in the upper social class of the south. Some were taught to feel better or more worthy than African Americans, gays, Catholics, the poor, and democrats—basically anyone who was different or had a varied religious or social belief than their own. Even when such clients would go to church, their beliefs would somehow mimic aristocracy, even when channeled through their religious ministers. In other words, if the person in this social class was doing what they were told God wanted by a minister, then that person assumed he or she was righteous.

But spirituality and religion are two very separate things. Religion would have you believe that right and wrong equals salvation; deeds equals righteousness. Growing spiritually, however, would keep you watchful and compassionate in your movement toward enlightenment, never judging those around you who have a different belief.

I pick this topic, because what we are taught from infancy, could possibly lead us to Attachment Issues in relationships of all kinds. If you don’t operate from your Authentic Self, then people who are true to themselves will see you as fake and self-righteous and avoidantly attached. In relationships, a false sense of self-righteousness might lead you to judge others with prejudice, even when you think you are on the right side of God.

Know this, though! If a person tends towards a self-righteous or prejudice belief in anything, you can be assured that you will find yourself on the opposing end of that attitude somewhere down the road in your interpersonal relationship. Dogs bark. Cats meow. And self-righteous people tend toward egocentrism, which never feels comfortable in relationship.

Our goal as spiritual neophytes is to breathe in pure, unadulterated God, without the need for understanding where we may be heading or with what information or anointing we are to share. In the appointed time, Spirit will lead us to whom and with what knowledge we are meant to use to impact our lives and others’ lives in the most positive ways.

When we come to believe that who we are is more special, because of how blessed, talented, or wealthy we are, then we tend to compartmentalize others and give advice without spiritual guidance. We are lead to believe: this is what is expected of me, so I should just do it.

A reader commented, yesterday, about my blog about evil and fear. She said that it was as if “evil isn’t a noun or an entity. It is more a negative act done by a child of God.” I truly think that was exactly what I wanted to say. Negative acts, however, could include being self-righteous, as this form of egocentricity leads to power struggles.

None of us are perfect or know everything we need to understand about life. So, to instruct anyone to believe as you do is just wrong. What spiritual teachers should be doing is helping people learn what it takes to get quiet and understand him/herself, first. If someone gets that far in his spiritual growth, then help that person begin to let God reveal Itself in the way that it is most comfortable for him or her.

In other words, if you are a flibbertigibbet, you may just need to find God in whimsy and in nature. Forgo church entirely, and listen to the crickets for advice!

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Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or www.bosebastian.com. FOR COMMENTS: Go to the Bo Sebastian link under the title and there is a place there to create a comment. Thanks.

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