Tuesday, March 31, 2015

Navigating Through Negatives #navigatethenegatives #principle #psychology #relationshipadvice

We live in a world of illusion. What we see in front of us is filtered through our human mind, which contains memories of everything we’ve ever seen, done, and felt throughout our lives. So, when something negative happens to us, we not only feel the ramifications of the present moment, but we also feel the negativity of every past situation that resembled it. So, how do we overcome this ever-growing negativity?

The Course in Miracles says:

There is no (human) world because it is a thought apart from God, and made to separate the Father and the Son, and break away a part of God Himself and thus destroy His Wholeness. Can a world that comes from this idea be real… Deny illusions, but accept the truth. Deny you are a shadow, briefly laid upon a dying world. Release your mind (from the past), and you will look upon a world released.

I remember a time in my life when I had been in a relationship with a man whom I thought would be my life partner. He lived two hours away from me, but we had been dating for three years. One day he called me and told me with bravado that he had a date with a woman the next evening.

I laughed. “You’re kidding, right?”

He said, “No. I met a really nice woman, and I want to go out with her.”

And the fight began. What started out as a great relationship turned into a nightmare in one minute. He broke up with me, hung up on me, and I didn’t hear from him again. As I sat on my living room couch crying, I called my mother, who had recently moved to Arizona be closer to me. She told me to come to her immediately.

As I entered her apartment, she said nothing, but held out her arms to hold her tearful son. I actually fell asleep in the comfort of a mother who had left my father and her six kids when I was eight. As I fell into a dream, I heard a voice say: “You are not crying because of Rob, you are crying because of your mother leaving you! Heal the wound with your mother, and you will heal all of the issues around relationships with men!”

When I woke up, I was certainly on the road to understanding the anxious attachment of my own soul to every man I had ever dated. This is just one example of how the past can color the present. My relationship with Rob was more of an illusion than it was real. He had been recently divorced, not out of the closet, had four children who were pissed because he was gay, and he lived in an unforgiving, very religious town that would have probably not used him as a physician had they known he was gay. So, the likelihood of him being a viable relationship for me was small. I didn’t lose him, really. I lost the idea that someone could be my perfect partner and protect me from the world, which is simply one big illusion, anyway.

Negativity can only be changed by applying truth and principle to your reality—right now. What do you need to learn from your current negative situation? When you get that one simple truth, you will begin to dig yourself out of the deep hole of anxiousness and depression. I promise!

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