Merging Business
with Successful Relationships
#relationshipadvice #businessandpleasure #drphil #homebusinesses #neurium
#relationshipadvice #businessandpleasure #drphil #homebusinesses #neurium
Dr. Phils says,
“Interpersonal conflict often arises when one of two parties doesn’t feel
valued, appreciated or respected.” I believe this can be the case when business
mixes with pleasure in any kind of relationship, especially intimate ones and
friendships.
I once was
married to a man for eight years who worked from home as an artist, while I
worked from home, as well. I took on the responsibility of being his art manager,
as he was a great painter, but not such a good market manager. Suddenly, lines
began to blur and our relationship was also a business. Looking back, I’m not
sure if that was such a good idea to help him, but you do what you need to do
to make relationships work. He, also, wasn’t so great at sharing
responsibilities in the house. In many ways marriage can be like dealing with a
business, especially where money is concerned. So, when one person does all the
managing work such as cleaning, paying the bills and cooking, I guarantee that
person will feel resentful and unheard.
In interpersonal
friendships, lines blur when we invite friends into business situations. A good
example of this is when a great friend asks you to take part in a home business
adventures such as Amway, Avon, Travel International, Mary Kay, Neurium, energy
drinks, telephone long distance plans, you name it. I think I’ve had an
experience with a friend asking me to join all of the above. I, inevitably,
have to stop a friend now in her tracks and say, “I have been down this road
with a friend, and I really don’t want this to mess up our relationship. But, I
can’t do this for you!”
With some really
good friends, this was difficult. When up-line sponsors teach down-line sellers
to get new people to buy into the business, they teach them business tricks. One
of these tricks is to mention you have an “opportunity” you want to share, but
not mention the name of the business. However, these tricks feel deceptive to
friends when placed in situations that look as if they need reciprocity. For
instance, a friend invites you to dinner. He pays. Then, mid-meal, he starts
sharing about his new business venture that has made so many people money. You
suddenly feel as if you must return the favor of dinner for listening to the speal, much like going on a “free”
vacation, only to get roped into contracting for a vacation week to the Bahamas
once a year.
Honestly, the
hardest part of being in self-made business is having to place your friends in
the position of helping you get your business or your art into the hands of
people who will pay the bills. It’s just good marketing to start with the
people who love and support you most to help spread the good news of your
business. It’s sometimes demeaning and often brings self-loathing, though, to
the business owner. I have known of many clients who have come to me with a
loss of self-esteem because of so many refusals in a sales position, especially
among friends and family. Salesmen have to have thick skin, but you don’t
imagine that having a home business would require that same cavalier attitude.
I have always
hated to market myself. But, I learned that if I was going to be in business
for myself, then it was eminent that I get over the marketing part. Some
friends walk away and feel offended when I talk about hypnosis or life coaching.
Others asks and stay around, because they understand and want to support me. Anyone’s
hope is that no one walks away when, for instance, you ask any them to take a
look at your new book. You have spent almost three long years creating 650
pages of so much needed advice about relationships, spirituality, and health.
At this point, you would give it away, if you could. But you have bills to pay
too. So, the expectation is that people who love you will buy it, whether they
will read it or not. I know, because I have a bookshelf and a drawer of music
and literature I’ve bought and never used. Some I have tried. Others, I simply
bought knowing I would never partake because of style or genre.
So, I’ve said all
this to introduce you to that new book below, the one I shared about above, so
useful to anyone on a journey for to a better you!
Finding Authentic You: With 365 Daily Discoveries & 7 Steps to Effective Change
I have to be
honest with you. I used that age-old marketing scheme, just now, to make my
point. So, how do you feel now that I have shared my business venture with you?
Do you feel unscathed and happy to help? Or, do you feel as if you have been
fooled into buying something you really don’t want or have the money for? The
hope of any friend, is that you will help. No one wants to bother you and force
you into anything. But with friendship, expectation follows, just the same as
with your intimate partner not participating in something important to you.
My mom bought my
book yesterday. She barely has the money for her medicine every month. But she
insisted. She wanted to help me get the sales going. You don’t know how much
that meant to me, because most people believe that others will help and simply
move on from the situation without reaching out to help a friend make something
big happen.
When a product
goes viral like Taylor Swift or Topsy Turvy, usually, the reason is that more
than a few friends realized that their friend’s product was awesome, so they
shared it with other friends. Yes, the product must be wonderful and useful for
this to happen. But the concept is the same for anything, which is why I have a
load of unread book and unused CDs from friends who reached out for help.
Help a friend
today realize his or her dream. You’ll feel better about creating your own
dream as you do, I assure you.
* Bo Sebastian is a
Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to
QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR
MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or http://bosebastian.com/Home_Page.php Please feel
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