Safe Sex? Killing Me Softly #safesex #sexuallytransmitteddisease #STD #HIV

Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs) or Diseases (STDs) are infections passed from person to person through intimate sexual contact. In the United States about 19 million new infections are thought to occur each year, affecting men and women of all ages and backgrounds. The most at-risk group is young people, ages 15-24. The highest rate of infection among race is African-Americans, especially the women of this race.

(Womenshealth.gov) As you can see by my description, sexual intimacy, sometimes even loving sex can cause an STI or STD and sometimes even kill a spouse or a lover. Why is this so endemic and still common in the world today?

Sexually transmitted disease just doesn’t happen by accident in 99.9% of the cases. Medical blood transfusions, these days, according to Avert.org cause very few cases in wealthy countries. It is suggested that 1 out of 6.5 million people may contract HIV from a transfusion in places such as Great Britain or United States. However, in poorer countries, such as Romania, the risk is much greater. The greatest amount of HIV transmission from blood bourn encounters, of course, is through dirty needles used by intravenous drug users.

So, we’re back to sex and its risks to the people you love. (Please note: though I’m using a married man’s story to explain the risks of STIs, straight or gay makes no difference in this scenario.) I knew of a man who was hiding the fact that he was gay from his work, his family of four, and most of his friends. He confided in me on the Internet, because he was interested in having sex with me and found me on a dating site—a very popular place for married men to hook-up.

Through a lot of inquiry, I discovered his story. He had a sales job that required a great deal of travel. During those times, he would let loose, get on the Internet, and hook-up with many different guys. Apparently, he wasn’t using protection during sexual intercourse, because he contracted HIV during one of his out-0f-town excursions. Because he didn’t consider who he was hurting in his sexual promiscuity and discovery of his own sexual identity, he put his entire family at risk, specifically his wife, whom he was still sleeping with. Apparently, he is, at the very least, confiding in new sexual partners that he is HIV+, which is good news, but don’t count on anyone to be honest with you about their HIV status.

I tell you this story, because YOU may be at risk, without even knowing it. I have a dear friend who was in a relationship for twenty years. The last seven of those years, his partner was HIV+ and never told him. In fact, in the last year of the relationship, his partner became symptomatic, which brought out the truth and the demise of the relationship, as well. If you have spent anytime volunteering at your local CARES (HIV help) centers, you would hear thousands of stories exactly like this one.

So, who should be tested? If you’re having unprotected sex with your partner, both of you should be tested once every six months. The reason why I suggest this is because transparency is so important in relationships. If you put your insecurities about health risks and sex out on the table, suggesting your partner and you both get tested every six months, the chances of someone doing something unseemly, sexually behind your back puts you at much less risk.

The last scenario I’ll deal with is open marriages. Many relationships and marriages are based on the mutual agreement that both parties can entertain sexual encounters as long as they are honest and safe. But, because alcohol, drugs, and stupidity often enter into the mix during these encounters, safety becomes a big concern in open relationships. You may be completely safe, using a condom during intercourse, but receiving and carrying to your partner a sexually transmitted disease such as gonorrhea, syphilis, or herpes, which are not blood bourn, is still a risk. All of these diseases are treatable, but who wants to get a disease they never intended to receive, especially from someone whom you love?

Can you kill someone you love from having sex with someone else? Absolutely, both psychologically and physically! Remember this before you make your next sexual choice.

Today's featured book is “Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior.” It's a book birthed from my own spiritual growth. I guarantee you'll love the 365 daily readings that will help you maintain a positive mind, body, and spirit. Also, if you click on the Amazon site, you'll see all of my 15 book— Cookbooks, Novels,  Self-Help Books, a Yoga DVD! All great gifts from your friend—Bo Sebastian. Simply go to this link at www.Amazon.com or type in my name. Find great gifts for yourself, family members, and friends by supporting another friend in the process! Thank you.

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A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian 

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

If you are a gay man or woman, you may want to direct your gaze to my newest blog: 

Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. This blog is an extension of my Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/UncommonGaySpiritualWarrior/) and group meetings about the rare combination of spirituality and "being gay" defines the most important part of us, even in relationship. Join me at: http://uncommongayspiritualwarrior.blogspot.com/. 

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: 

The Mirror of Our Relationships #relationships #relationshipadvice #gayrelationships #gaymarriage

It is said that to understand ourselves, we need a mirror. Often this mirror comes in the form of personal relationships, because those who are closest to us help us learn our biggest lessons. What this means is that we often attract people to our lives to teach us what we need to know about ourselves. These lessons are usually in the form of attracting a certain kind of behavior that brings up a particular attribute of our personality. Perhaps, the same relationship keeps coming into your life with a different face or name, but has all the same qualities. Each time, this personality type brings out a quality in you that exasperates you. If this happens, you know that your mirror has appeared!

Lately, I have been attracting addicts to my life. We know that even someone who is twenty years sober still deals with the same issues. So, this addictive type of person brings up a certain behavior in me with which I obviously need to observe.

For many years, all of my best friends have been in the 12-step programs. So, maybe I felt as if an addict’s behavior was safe. When I moved to South Florida, most of those old friends are far enough away that I don’t feel as if I have their undivided attention or support, anymore. So, perhaps, when I began to date again, I attracted what felt safe.

With this theory, you must realize that when you begin to react certain ways from a particular behavior or from personal relationships, you must look inside to find out the reason you have attracted it. This is the mirror theory. Most people would simply keep blaming the person bringing up the issues.

If you’ve ever been in therapy or self-analysis of any kind, you know that the only answers to getting better or feeling whole is to go inside and work from inside out. Therefore, as I went inside, I realized that what a date’s addictive behavior brought up in me was a feeling that I was not enough to keep a lover’s attention. I felt insecure and abandoned. This happened because an addict who is working the program spends a large majority of his/her time on going to meetings and working on the 12 steps.

So, when I would reach out for my date to be there, he would often be away—in his mind and physically. This brought up old feelings of abandonment. So, I had to go back to the drawing board and begin to reacquaint myself with the belief that I have been created in the nature and form of Creator God. As I believe this, I must also believe that God is not incomplete, so neither am I.

Remember: Right thinking is saving ourselves from our own insanity!

If I continued to find myself believing this old story of being abandoned, then I will certainly seek spiritual or psychological help, because that is what an adult does who wants to grow into a stronger, deeper individual.

So, the mirrors in our lives are not there to keep us pissed off or angry. They are there to help us discover or rediscover our own issues and work on ourselves. This is not to say that, when we get stronger, that mirror may no longer need to be in our lives. Most times, though, you’ll notice that when you get the message to work on yourself, your partner also begins to change as a result of your behavioral differences. This results in symbiotic metamorphosis.

 

A Cookbook, a Novel, a Self-Help Book, a Yoga DVD! All great gifts from your friend—Bo Sebastian. Simply go to this link at www.Amazon.com or type in my name. Find great gifts for yourself, family members, and friends by supporting another friend in the process! Thank you.

* * *

 

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

 What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

If you are a gay man or woman, you may want to direct your gaze to my newest blog: Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. This blog is an extension of my Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/UncommonGaySpiritualWarrior/) and group meetings about the rare combination of spirituality and "being gay" defines the most important part of us, even in relationship. Join me at: http://uncommongayspiritualwarrior.blogspot.com/. 

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]

The Difference in One Pill #prescriptionmeds #medicine #holistichealth

I have always thought that my life would be much better if I didn’t take any prescription medications. In fact, most people who come through my doors feel the same. A holistic approach to health is an admirable desire, except in some instances when neurological or psychological problems occur. Then, sometimes one pill can be the difference between sanity and insanity. I have an interesting story to prove my point.

As I have had to change insurance companies, I didn’t think it was necessary for me to have a December appointment with my old PCP, because I was about to get a new one. However, by not going to that appointment, in January that same doctor would not prescribe two medications for me. I called his cell phone in hopes that he would reconsider. The pharmacy called his office, but to no avail. One of these prescriptions was considered a psychotropic drug and also is a scheduled drug, which means that it must be prescribed monthly. Even if the prescription had 2-3 refills on it, the pharmacy, by law, cannot dispense this medicine in Florida. In Nashville, I could have this medicine prescribed for 6 months without a problem. So, suddenly, I was without a medication I had been taking for 5-6 years.

I had no idea what horrors the next month would hold, or I would have gone to the emergency room or a Doc in the Box to seek help. My symptoms started off with sleeplessness. Since I was taking Klonopin as a mild sedative to help me relax, I figured that sleeplessness would happen. So, I endured. However, in the coming days, strange effects began to happen. I lost senses in my mouth. Everything tasted like metal. Then, at night, when I would try to sleep, my heart would race, so badly that I wouldn’t fall asleep until three in the morning. My fingers and toes would go numb. And I would get so hot that I would sweat terribly.

Even these symptoms seemed tolerable until the worst symptom of all came three weeks into the withdrawal. My blood pressure raised to 180 over 129. When this happened, I lasted about two days before I took myself to the Emergency Room. I sincerely thought I was having a heart attack. All of these physical symptoms had no bearing on the mental anguish all of this caused. I felt as if I was going crazy. I was anxious for a couple of weeks and even broke up with a guy I had been dating during that time, maybe because I was unable to distinguish right from left, happy from sad.

One hour after I got to the ER and was treated for the withdrawal, my body began to go back to normal. Only two days after the visit, I am back to normal and can hardly believe I let myself go through the mental and physical anguish of the last month. I find it easy to blame the doctor who took care of me for a year then abandoned me at the end of the year. But the truth is the fault lays directly on me. I should have gone to the December appointment. I would have been covered until the appointment with my new PCP, which I wasn’t able to attain until February 17. One doesn’t think that a doctor’s appointment will take that long to get, which is why I didn’t worry about going to the December appointment. Medical care in another state, especially one such as Florida, can be very different in its approach to dispensing medicines.

Over the years, I have had a few clients who are consistently hyper and anxious. One, in particular, has congestive heart failure and rarely takes medication. She tells me that her blood pressure and blood sugars are always elevated. This would lead me to believe that her sleeplessness and anxiety is probably directly related to her NOT taking her meds.

If I had to choose between taking one pill to help me feel normal and not taking the pill and feel anxious, sleepless, and in pain; I would choose taking the pill. Hands down! No questions asked. I’ll never go through this anguish again.

 

____________

A Cookbook, a Novel, a Self-Help Book, a Yoga DVD! All great gifts from your friend—Bo Sebastian. Simply go to this link at www.Amazon.com or type in my name. Find great gifts for yourself, family members, and friends by supporting another friend in the process! Thank you.

* **

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

If you are a gay man or woman, you may want to direct your gaze to my newest blog: Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. This blog is an extension of my Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/UncommonGaySpiritualWarrior/) and group meetings about the rare combination of spirituality and "being gay" defines the most important part of us, even in relationship. Join me at: http://uncommongayspiritualwarrior.blogspot.com/. 

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]

 

 

Razor's Edge of Governmental Destruction

The Razor’s Edge of Governmental Destruction

Let’s face it, the primary resolution of the government for the last few years has been dissention. If one party wants an issue resolved, the other party will find a reason to filibuster. If one party has a primary goal, the opposing party will gather all their might and vetoing power and get the media to crucify the opposing desire. Politically, the United States has been in a stalemate and has been for years. Healthcare for all is probably the first issue that the Democrats have fought for and won, but not without the entire country teetering on the Debt Crisis deadline.

How do we get beyond this problem? If we get a Republican leader, all the Democrats do is try to find fault with him or her. If we get a Democrat leader, the Republicans wage war with their myriad financial campaigns. I feel that one day someone is going to rise up from the unlikely ranks of the Independents and find a home in all of our hearts—well, the majority of our hearts. The ship has sunk on the ideas of equal right for parties and factions.

I think about what this means on a spiritual level. A metaphor exists somewhere in this mundane war of factions. But what could it be? What do you believe God is trying to teach the world, or simply the people of the United States about divisiveness and partisan splits?

I’m of the belief that truth will always rise to the surface. I have to be on the side of everyone getting an honest shake at healthcare, because I believe that’s what God would want. But I don’t have to be on the side of how it is done. It has been a disaster, to say the least, as we all can see by the approval ratings of President Obama yesterday in the polls. But, at this point, the president really doesn’t even have to care about approval. He doesn’t have another election coming up. I suppose that is why he waited until his second term to do the impossible.

Yesterday, Hawaii became the 14^th state to legalize gay marriage while 35 other states banned gay marriage completely. Another faction with morality and fairness at its roots. Again, I’m on the side of legalizing gay marriage because I’m gay, and I’m tired of being treated like a second-rate citizen because of my sexual preference.

I guess, on some level, you have to experience the downtrodden to actually to wage war against the problem. Most Republicans are on the side of money because they have little financial issues. So, whatever makes more sense about keeping more of their money and paying less tax, they get on board for. I have many Republican friends. Very few of them are not wealthy Americans. I believe it was Jesus who said in Matthew 19:24, that “it will be easier for camel to pass through the eye of a needle than a rich man enter into heaven.”

Why do you think Jesus would make that huge judgment? It’s a very simple idea. Money eschews our thinking. If we don’t have enough, we spend all our time worrying about getting enough to make it. If we have a great deal of money, we spend all of our time trying to keep it and the security we think it brings.

So, at the root of all of this governmental problems is basically greed. I know some would like us to believe it is morality and religion, but, let’s face it, most of our biggest moral leaders have been taken down by their own lack of morality. Religion is not the problem. In fact, everyday, more and more religions are becoming tolerant and more loving toward the downtrodden gays and prejudiced minorities.

The only thing left separating the left from the right is big money.

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Go to Week 4 of the “Year to CLEAR Challenge” at www.Bosebastian.com

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Look for MY LATEST BOOK:  “Finding Authentic You, 7 Steps to Effective Change” with a Year to CLEAR (C-larity, L-ove, E-nthusiasm A-nd R-elationship-Ready) on my Website in the Webstore. Thanks!

Below is information that I will be sharing for about a month, as not every person on my list reads the blog every day. If you have already read it, just skip over it. Thanks for understanding.

A Year to CLEAR Challenge:

(Please Know: You Can Join Us At Any Point in the Year Challenge.)

The masses search outward for things that qualify them as a person, but I always go inward for that which quantifies me for greatness. At twenty-five I preached on street corners in NYC as an in-the-closet Pentecostal minister. One day I heard a still small voice say, ‘God cannot be contained in a book or a law or even in a religion. Dig deeper, reach further to find me, and you will find your authentic Self.’”

A Year to CLEAR Challenge!

The acronym CLEAR stands for (Compassionate, Loving, Enthusiastic, And Relationship-Ready). The goal of this project is to engulf readers in a weekly study that will transform them by removing blocks, promote self-growth, and give them wings to fly freely into daily life. Each week, by going to BoSebastian.com and choosing the Year to CLEAR Challenge tab, a new challenge or thought to provoke conversation, growth, and group functionality.

My vision is to make Finding Authentic You the book to have in your Kindle or on your computer. The book is a comprehensive look at growth—spiritually, mentally, and physically.

As a yoga teacher and student of the Ayurvedic tradition, I bring to the table understanding of physical challenges, the ability to overcome mental problems with Life & Health Coaching, as well as hypnotherapy, and expertise in meditation and spirituality as a minister.

The combination of all three in one book with an interactive connection to like-minded readers, for one year, is what makes this Year to CLEAR Challenge a must-do for every spiritual seeker.

The One-Year Approach to Change

No one believes he or she can change overnight. But success in change comes from the metaphors of nature. Seasonally, life changes all around us in nature. Finding Authentic You offers a gradual change perspective, looking at the triune aspects of change as in yoga: Body, Mind and Spirit.

Accessing the ability to change and finding yourself actually pursuing change must be a daily search, which I call getting to the “observer mind.”

In this frontal cortex of the brain we find the anatomy of change and the power to counter every negative trigger of the human process. The workings of Hypnosis, NLP (Neuro-linguistic Programming) and EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) are all positive actions to help the mind and body flow to a positive space for change.

Every aspect of FINDING AUTHENTIC YOU fulfills this constant need for diffusing the negative past and dreaming of a fulfilling future.

Step 1: Recognize That Change is Inevitable

Step 2: Release from Resistance to Change

Step 3: Understanding Change and Allow Spirit to Define It

Step 4: A History Lesson—About You

Step 5: Look at Your Past with Compassion

Step 6: Making a Strong Commitment to Change

Step 7: Dream Your Fabulous Future

Go to www.bosebastian.com for Week One to Four Challenges:

TOOLS FOR CHANGE:

Go to Storefront to buy any of the following or make a donation to Finding Authentic You: www.shop.bosebastian.com

·       My Latest Book: Finding Authentic You—7 Steps to Effective Change (800 page downloadable Kindle version)

·       Introduction to Meditation

·       Smoke Cessation mp3

·       Weight Loss mp3

·       Hypnotic Lap Band surgery Mp3

·       Insomnia mp3

·       Eternal Om mp3

·       Meditation Music mp3

·       Guide to Meditation mp3

·       Healing the Body mp3

·       And my “Lessons from the Heart” book ready for your download purchase.

Go to Home Page: www.BoSebastian.com

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Bo Sebastian is a Hypnotherapist and Life & Health Coach, available for private sessions to QUIT SMOKING, Lose Weight, New Lap-Band Hypnosis for Weight Loss, CHANGE YOUR MIND, CHANGE YOUR LIFE! at 615-400-2334 or www.bosebastian.com. Please feel free to comment and/or sign up to receive your blog sent to you directly or stream with an RSS Feed.

I am trying to spread the word about my blog and I need your help. Please let your friends know it exists, if it gives you hope and blesses you each day.  I would be greatly pleased for you to share anything that you read by clicking the share button in Facebook.com/bo.sebastian, or add it to your Twitter at BoSebastian; or LinkedIN at Bosebastian5@gmail.com; or find this blog home at www.FindingAuthenticYou.com. Any of my books can be found on Amazon or Barnes and Nobel, just by typing my name in the search header. Also, look for MY LATEST BOOK:  “Finding Authentic You, 7 Steps to Effective Change” with a Year to CLEAR (C-larity, L-ove, E-nthusiasm A-nd R-elationship-Ready) on my Website in the Webstore. Thanks!