HEALING YOUR DEEPEST SELF-WOUNDS

Bet You Didn’t Know This!

Happiness has everything to do with learning to love yourself, first, than it has to do with being concerned about what others think about you and your decisions. Contrary to this, it is only through the eyes of others we see our deepest feelings about ourselves.

Read the Quote below from Psychology Today.

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Also, check out my new book: “Your New Story, Your New Life” The Metaphysical Mind.

GO TO AMAZON

_____________________________________

Continued from above:

From Psychology Today:

Everyone's heard this self-help platitude:
We need to love ourselves before we can love anyone else. This may sound wise, but it misses a great truth; if we want to experience true intimacy, we need to be taught to love aspects of ourselves--again and again--by the people around us.

As much as we want to control our own destiny, the humbling truth is that sometimes the only way to learn self-love is by being loved-precisely in the places where we feel most unsure and most tender. When that happens, we feel freedom and relief-and permission to love in a deeper way. No amount of positive self-talk can replicate this experience. It is a gift of intimacy, not of will-power.

My fiancé and I had a bit of a tumble yesterday when I said to him: “I would really love to see what your hair looks like grown out!” He shaves his head. I’ve never seen him with hair on his head.

After he pouted a bit, he confessed that he thought that I didn’t like how he looked with a shaved head. In other words, he risked being told something harsh and hurting deeper to hear what I really felt.

I was so thankful to hear him immediately share his truth that I was easily able to say, “Of course, I love you and think you’re hot just the way you are. I’m just curious, that’s all.” (I actually had to do a bit more talking him down from his desire to avoid me and his feelings. Mostly, we got over the problem very quickly and simply by being honest.

The quote from Psychology Today makes the most sense when you look at it as I have exemplified from above. If you have never trusted someone enough with your heart and your feelings to allow a person to love you where you feel most vulnerable, you will probably never be healed in that place. It’s harsh, but true.

·       We can love ourselves a great deal.

·       We can work on our truths in many aspects.

·       We can become monks and never have to deal with another person, only Spirit.

·       But the one aspect of life we get on earth is that we must exist in relationship to understand how deeply words and our feelings impact us.

With me, I’m usually the last person who knows how much something hurts, until I’m in a position where someone judges me. I believed or, at least, told myself that I have taken care of that part of me that cares what other’s think. But, ultimately, the words someone else says about you often bring up what you think of ourselves. So, it is in relationship that we discover the deepest places that we need to heal.

Hopefully, this relationship will be with those same people who love you way past your faults, or a therapist, or life coach that you can work on those places that most affect the way you feel about yourself.

* * *

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493
 (Sessions CAN BE DONE via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly toAmazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: ]

Coming soon, my partner David Menton and I are planning to start a Vlog with Vegetable Based enriched recipes from my plethora of fun and easy ways to make food taste amazing. Enjoy!

New Year—New You!

New Year—New You
#newyearsresolutions #newhabits #relationshipwithself #NOW

It has been discovered that over 60% of people who start out intending on some behavior change in January drop off by February. I’m sure by March another 25% leave and are back to their old workaholic or couch-potato habits.

Change is difficult. Getting over the old habits and becoming accustomed to new beliefs and ideas takes total openness. Beside that, change takes an authentic desire. Here are a few ways to help below:

__________________________________________

Sign up for our mailing list BELOW. You’ll be privy to the latest and greatest ways to help yourself eat, exercise, meditate, and express your authentic life in ways you never thought possible. I promise not to flood you with ads or sell your name to advertisers. This is a personal e-mail server, which I use only to make big announcements. Thanks for signing up in advance.

https://visitor.r20.constantcontact.com/d.jsp?llr=euba6yyab&p=oi&m=1126117148292&sit=4zezfe4kb&f=73a1949c-5582-4fe3-8ec4-d7a9c6604f38

Also, check out my new book: “Your New Story, Your New Life” The Metaphysical Mind.

GO TO AMAZON

_______________________________________________

Continued from above:

Yesterday I decided on two New Year’s resolutions. The first one is to stop being critical of those around me—in my mind and out loud! The second was to stop drinking alcohol. Two sips of champagne last night before midnight was the end for me.

I don’t have much of a problem with each of these behaviors, but I want to continue to grow as an individual always. I know judging anyone, including myself, is a difficult matter to change, especially when we spend most days looking at the world with a quizzical eye and wondering what the hell!”

Personally, after I woke up on New Year’s Day and meditated, just one hour later, I had already broken my promised not to judge. Not once. Not twice, but three times.

My mother is visiting! Wow, the past brings up so much old behavior that the frontal cortex of the brain doesn’t have a chance to make a different choice before one has already emotionally reacted.

This is actually a physiological fact, especially with those with Post Traumatic Stress syndrome. Therapists also believe deep Attachment Disorders would carry the same impact on the brain’s functionality.

So, in changing our behavior, we have to be as compassionate to ourselves as we are to a child if we were trying to guide that child out of old, negative behavior. We don’t scold! We remind our children with a stern and steady hand. 

An adult mind has a great advantage over the child’s mind. The adult can begin to see the triggers before of the behavior and avoid the triggers. This helps alleviate the problem. With the child, the triggers probably haven’t developed so strongly, yet. Neuropathic behavior strengthens as the behavior continues in life. So, children are best to train at a young age.

As an adult, I know that family is probably the only thing that can get under my skin. I don’t want to avoid them, because I seriously love my family. I simply must make better boundaries.

Sometimes when my mother is talking, I actually put her through a filter in my mind. I half-listen. This keeps me from being so reactionary. However, what I was complaining about this morning to my fiancé was about her controlling behavior towards me and the family. I’m fairly certain this is not going to change. She’s 84 and has no desire to change. So, avoiding the triggers is my best chance at having a good relationship with her and keeping myself at peace.

With these kinds of emotional changes, we have to be completely compassionate to ourselves and keep good boundaries until we’ve discovered the truth about life: That there is only One Mind! Somewhere, somehow, that One Mind is reflecting something we need to learn or understand or be compassionate to through the people we love the most.

* * *

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_0_6?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=bo%20sebastian&sprefix=bo+seb%2Caps%2C190&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Abo%20sebastian]

Coming soon, my partner David Menton and I are planning to start a Vlog with Vegetable Based enriched recipes from my plethora of fun and easy ways to make food taste amazing. Enjoy!

MY Grown-UP New Year's List

MY GROWN-UP NEW YEAR’S LIST
#newyearsresolutions #newhabits #relationshipwithself #NOW

No matter how many times we think of New Year—NEW ME, most people are more comfortable with living in their old habits than they are able to change to new habits.

It has been discovered that over 60% of people who start out at the gym in January drop off by February. I’m sure by March another 25% leave and are back to their old workaholic or couch-potato habits.

Change is difficult. Getting over the old habits and becoming accustomed to new beliefs and ideas takes total openness. Beside that, change takes an authentic desire. Here are a few ways to help below:

__________________________________________

Sign up for our mailing list BELOW. You’ll be privy to the latest and greatest ways to help yourself eat, exercise, meditate, and express your authentic life in ways you never thought possible. I promise not to flood you with ads or sell your name to advertisers. This is a personal e-mail server, which I use only to make big announcements. Thanks for signing up in advance.

https://visitor.r20.constantcontact.com/d.jsp?llr=euba6yyab&p=oi&m=1126117148292&sit=4zezfe4kb&f=73a1949c-5582-4fe3-8ec4-d7a9c6604f38

Also, check out my new book: “Your New Story, Your New Life” The Metaphysical Mind.

GO TO AMAZON

_______________________________________________

Continued from above:

Every year for the last thirty, I have done a Burning Bowl Ceremony on the eve of the New Year. The process is simple. On a piece of paper, you simply write down all of the things, people, and habits you want to see changed in your life. The things that no longer serve you are at the top of the list.

If you have friendships or relationships that are sucking away your vital life energy, it’s time for those to end.

If you have a job that you have been holding on to because you don’t think you are worthy of a better one, it’s time to begin the releasing process.

If you have been poor your entire life, it’s time to let go of that negative thinking and begin thinking like a prosperous person. You are a reflection of God’s perfection. In this universe there is no lack of anything. Neither is there lack for you or your family.

There is no better time to put away the junk food, the bad health, and the wasted time not exercising. You can do this!

If you have been thinking about a project, but have never started or completed it, it’s time to get it out and finish it.

Simply write everything down that has held you back from your greatest potential. Put that piece of paper in a safe place to burn it. You can say a prayer before it. You can chant. You can sing. You can do nothing. But the ritual itself will help you move on. I promise.

Look for my suggestions tomorrow to tell you what I do on New Year’s Day to apply this new thinking to my next year of prosperous and joyful life!

* * *

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_0_6?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=bo%20sebastian&sprefix=bo+seb%2Caps%2C190&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Abo%20sebastian]

Coming soon, my partner David Menton and I are planning to start a Vlog with Vegetable Based enriched recipes from my plethora of fun and easy ways to make food taste amazing. Enjoy!

Rashers and Bangers: Dating Outside Your Culture #datingadvice #languagebarriers #UScustoms #relationships

Rashers and Bangers: Dating Outside Your Culture
#datingadvice #languagebarriers #UScustoms #relationships

If you’ve ever travelled to a different country or known a person from a different culture, you will understand immediately that understanding language, lifestyles, and popular words and phrases can take some time.

I have been dating a native Irishman for over a year. Still, after 14-15 months, he often says something that I’ve never heard before. Today, I discovered that rashers are bacon and bangers are sausages. Since we are both vegans, those words never came up before. I have learned to listen to the small ways he uses language different than I and inquire a great deal. The tiniest nuances can change the meaning of a sentence, even in an English-based language.

Personally, I think it’s fun to discover something new and out of the narrow box I’ve lived in for 50 years. What about cultural or language difference, though, that might get in the way of relationships? Should you consider this before dating someone from another country?

I answer the question below:

__________________________________________

Sign up for our mailing list BELOW. You’ll be privy to the latest and greatest ways to help yourself eat, exercise, meditate, and express your authentic life in ways you never thought possible. I promise not to flood you with ads or sell your name to advertisers. This is a personal e-mail server, which I use only to make big announcements. Thanks for signing up in advance.

https://visitor.r20.constantcontact.com/d.jsp?llr=euba6yyab&p=oi&m=1126117148292&sit=4zezfe4kb&f=73a1949c-5582-4fe3-8ec4-d7a9c6604f38

Also, check out my new book: “Your New Story, Your New Life” The Metaphysical Mind.

GO TO AMAZON

_______________________________________________

Continued from above:

Love comes in many packages. However, understanding love when it comes in a package wrapped in a foreign language and unusual cultures may be something you would want to investigate before moving forward with the relationship too quickly.

An example that happened to me before I got involved with my fiancé was dating a Cuban man in South Florida. The Cuban culture is very different than most Latin American cultures. The men are more dominant. Being gay is not something most parents would accept. Passion and love are two very different things. The word “dear” is not used for someone who is a lover. Dear (estimado) is more of a friendship term and dear (cariño) is a more intimate way of expressing closeness.

When you express something in English, it can often be offensive to the Cuban. And ultimately fiery anger can happen. I have found this to be true with most Latin Americans. When North Americans might consider angry outbursts offensive, in other cultures they are quite normal. Does it mean that this person is not interested in you or doesn’t love you? Does it mean that they will be violent? The questions begin to mount as the relationship gets more serious. The language barrier becomes more and more prominent as you begin to desire to express deeper feelings about your love.

Americans have one word for love. Spanish people have many ways to express loving someone. So, when they use the word love, you have to inquire about which kind of love they are expressing. Is it love like a family member (quererse), is it like  (gustarse), love like “really enjoy the most” (enamorse), love as in marital love or the love of a parent to a child (amar), expressing that you are a boyfriend or girlfriend (novio, novia), a couple (pareja), etc. There are actually some 36 ways to show different kinds of love at different intensities in the Spanish Language. Also, each Spanish-speaking country has different ways as well.

My point is this: Getting involved with someone from another culture who speaks English can be quite an eye-opener. More importantly, when you meet someone that you care for who speaks an entirely different language and has an entirely different cultural background than you do, you may be in for a really bad experience when expressing the much-needed “deep conversations” it takes to communicate your authentic feelings.

Personally, I’m not sure any lasting relationship can happen without being able to share the deepest words of your heart. Actions can express feelings, but words are our greatest way of sharing how we feel. When we can’t share these words, then this becomes a barrier to deeper love.

If you seek to not want to share your deepest feelings, this may be exactly why you are attracted to foreigners. But, getting into the relationship with full knowledge of your intention is very important. You do not want to end up marrying someone that you are passionate about and realize you have been deceived to get a Green Card, because you were never able to ask the questions you needed to ask.

Remember: a person doesn’t have to lie, when he or she doesn’t understand the question.

* * *

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_0_6?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=bo%20sebastian&sprefix=bo+seb%2Caps%2C190&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Abo%20sebastian]

Coming soon, my partner David Menton and I are planning to start a Vlog with Vegetable Based enriched recipes from my plethora of fun and easy ways to make food taste amazing. Enjoy!

Rockin’ Too Hard on New Year’s Eve #holidayrun #holidaystress #knowyourtruth #spirituality

Rockin’ Too Hard on New Year’s Eve
#holidayrun #holidaystress #knowyourtruth #spirituality

From twenty to thirty years old I lived in Midtown, Manhattan. I live ten-minutes away from 40th and Broadway where the Famous New Year’s Eve Ball drops. Occasionally, at 30 minutes until midnight, I would walk over to 44th and Broadway, weave through the myriad 0f people and stand in the center of all of the craziness until the ball dropped.

I wanted to feel the sensation of the biggest party in the world. What I felt instead was rash behavior all around me from drunkenness, drugs, fights, inappropriate amorous behavior and, it seemed, a need to express erratic behavior simply because he or she could. The lines to get home on the subway for a million people took until 5 or 6 a.m. to wane. Still, people didn’t care. They came for a party, some loud music, and to see the New Years roll in with a bang. Maybe more importantly, to let go of that old year that stunk worse than the street would the next morning.

Why is it that people party so hard? What exactly does it offer them?

Check it out below:

___________________________________________

Sign up for our mailing list BELOW. You’ll be privy to the latest and greatest ways to help yourself eat, exercise, meditate, and express your authentic life in ways you never thought possible. I promise not to flood you with ads or sell your name to advertisers. This is a personal e-mail server, which I use only to make big announcements. Thanks for signing up in advance.

https://visitor.r20.constantcontact.com/d.jsp?llr=euba6yyab&p=oi&m=1126117148292&sit=4zezfe4kb&f=73a1949c-5582-4fe3-8ec4-d7a9c6604f38

Also, check out my new book: “Your New Story, Your New Life” The Metaphysical Mind.

GO TO AMAZON

_______________________________________________

Continued from above:

I spoke with a great friend this morning who has a sister who showed up on Christmas Eve at his home drunk. She was loud, obnoxious, and even begged her mother to stay up and drink with her till dawn. In other words, her drunkenness wasn’t enough. She wanted to continue to drink, because, apparently, she did not want her buzz to wear off. Why do you suppose someone who normally doesn’t party so hard would want to unleash and let go with such abandonment?

My theory is that people who are not in touch with what they need in life or are not a spiritual path, generally store up negativity and anxiety. Occasionally, or maybe even every weekend, they go out and party to keep their minds from obsessing about their unhappiness and to keep from erupting like a dormant volcano that at its core is still connected to the fiery core of the earth.

When someone continues to drink way after they are already drunk, this is definitely a sign of alcoholism, even if it is on a binge basis. When you have one drink and all you can think about is the next one, it’s time to see a therapist or go to a 12-step program about your addiction.

No outside source, drug, extravagance or love interest can change or relieve your level of anxiety and stress. You must take care of that all on your own. You can have the help and aid of a professional or programs, but you will soon find out that your problem is a personal one that can only be changed by you.

To sum up, wanting to celebrate is okay. But understand that if you have a need to party too often and too hard with drugs and alcohol, then you probably need some help discovering what you are running away from.

Anxiety, hating your job, struggle in relationships, growing up with abuse, financial distress only get greater when you add an addiction on top of it. To get your life in order, you must take the steps to watch your behavior and decide if it is helping your life or hurting it.

No amount of partying and festivities can delight your heart enough to be worth the headache and malaise you will certainly feel the next day. The older you get, the worse that boomerang effect becomes.

Have a great New Years by doing a Burning Bowl Ceremony. Write down all of your negative things you want to be rid of the next year. Burn it in a bowl. Then, of course, pray for guidance for planting new, amazing seeds for next year.

* * *

A Single Session w/Bo Sebastian

What would you feel like if everyday you loved yourself a little more…

What would you be if you loved and gave compassion unconditionally… to yourself first and then to others?

If you could imagine yourself so connected to God Source that everything you thought and every action you completed you trusted could heal yourself and, ultimately the world around you?

Create a Better Life with One Healing Session with Bo Sebastian

Call 954-253-6493 (All Sessions are done via PHONE, SKYPE or FACETIME.)

www.bosebastian.com

Bo works with people on SKYPE and FaceTime all over the world. He is taking new clients now. Call 954-253-6493 for information.

Take the time to look at Bo’s bookshelf of self-help books, novels, healing downloads, and yoga DVD. All of Bo’s books help people such as you, make SIGNIFICANT CHANGE with habits, find your SOULMATE, your PASSION, reach YOUR DREAMS, and dictate your own FUTURE.

Chosen to show his new hypnotherapeutic techniques on The Learning Channel (TLC) and also given the opportunity to teach at the world conference for Learning, and received the award of excellence for Helping Overcome Obesity in Nashville, Bo Sebastian is the writer and director of Finding Authentic You and Uncommon Gay Spiritual Warrior. Go directly to Amazon/Amazon Kindle to buy any of his wonderfully inspired books: http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_0_6?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=bo%20sebastian&sprefix=bo+seb%2Caps%2C190&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Abo%20sebastian]

Coming soon, my partner David Menton and I are planning to start a Vlog with Vegetable Based enriched recipes from my plethora of fun and easy ways to make food taste amazing. Enjoy!